The story of Jesus turning water into wine is one of the most favorite Christian stories; it has also been referenced in secular discourse and literature. For those who do not know, this was Jesus’ first miracle, performed at a wedding. He turned water to wine when the supply had run out. This event is often used as justification by Christians who love their liquor (greetings brethren!). If you’re wondering how this relates to love and relationships, just hang on.
A few days ago, after a hearty dinner of boiled plantains and fish/veggie sauce, my parents and I started discussing issues in relationships and marriages, triggered by my short story here. After all the back and forth, my Dad said ‘there is nothing hidden from anyone in a relationship, and especially when it’s tending to marriage; all the signs are usually revealed, people just choose to ignore them.’ I replied that at times these signs were not visible during the courtship phase as some people are quite skilled at hiding their true selves, their partner only able to find out after marriage.
He however insisted that those who could truly hide their colors were a tiny minority, and that the problem was that the ‘younger generation’ do not pay close attention to important things but instead get carried away by trips to Mr. Biggs and the cinema (just like we used to call all detergents ‘OMO’, my Dad refers to every fast-food restaurant as Mr. Biggs).
I have seen many instances where people go into a relationship with someone knowing their true colors and still expecting them to change. Some people meet their partners at a club, a bottle in one hand and a cigarette in the other and then months down, expect this person to quit their nightly rounds. Some others know they are the reason their partners left their ex and then cry foul when the old broom is brought out of the corner. They must have fancied themselves miracle workers, possessing special powers, capable of changing their partner, yimu!
Yes, there have been instances where people change, but from the stories out there, these cases are few and far between. For those who think marriage will change their partner and wipe away all their flaws, my married friends have this to say, ‘everything multiplies in the wedding, both good and bad’ and as my preacher once said, ‘there are no miracles at the altar (or registry, or traditional wedding venue), what you see before the vows, is exactly what you get after the vows’.
In conclusion, it is safe to say that in relationships, we should not assume that we can turn water into wine; find your taste and stick to it, be it coffee, whiskey, rum, Orijin, shekpe, red wine or water. Choose your drink and relish every drop.