The Coffin Maker Episode 84

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Julia sings and dances happily to her suite, but some few steps to the door, something hit her that all was not well back in the room where she left Mike. She finally got to the door and started knocking politely from the start, but as she knocked for some time and there was no response, she started knocking heavily which called the attention of other guests who were also lodging in the hotel.

Neighbour:

Excuse me young lady, is everything okay here? Your constant noise making is kind of creating inconvenience for my family and I. My new born son just slept, after hours of trying to put him to sleep as the mother has gone out to fix her hair.

Julia:

(wanting to be rude but kept her composure) Sorry about that Sir. I and my boyfriend are the occupants of this suite. I left him for a meeting and forgot to take along the door card. I returned to see the door is locked, and after several knocks on the door, there is no response from him.

Neighbour:

Really? I think I heard some people talking some minutes ago in this very room, but I didn’t come out so I can’t tell if he has stepped out or there is any problem.

Julia:

Has he stepped out or he has drunk himself to stupor? (starts knocking again in front of the man)

Neighbour 2:

(steps out of her suite) Hey young woman, I hope you are not too blind to see the inscriptions pasted boldly over there that unnecessary noise making is prohibited here. Some of us came here to relax and refresh our bodies and minds, so don’t spoil our reggae with your funk. I paid hundreds of dollars to acquire a room here so kindly respect yourself and abide by the simple rules that have been stipulated down for guests and clients that patronise this hotel.

Neighbour:

Ma’am if truly you were in this room, then I will phone the receptionist so that they bring a master card to open the door for you. If it happens that you were lying to me erh, you will know who you are dealing with. Excuse me as I make the call inside my room for them to bring the master card.

Neighbour 2:

I will wait here for the receptionist to come up with the master card and also confirm to us that indeed you are the person lodging in this expensive room as young as you are.

Julia:

See her too! How much money did you pay to acquire the room you are in?. Why would I dress myself from the comfort of my house and come to this hotel, bypass the security, walk through the reception, join the elevator leading to the last floor and knock only on this door without trying any other one. Learn to shut your big mouth up small madam.

Neighbour:

Mmm young woman I have placed a call through to the reception and I was assured that someone has been dispatched here to see to it that everything is okay.

Julia:

Thank you very much, Sir for your care and concern about me.

Neighbour 2:

The end will justify its means, and we will see whether you are the occupant of that room or you are either a night worker or slay queen.

Julia:

Madam I have tried very well not to be rude or use any abusive words towards you, but it seems you are doing everything humanly possible to make me react in a very cold way towards you.

I am just calm because, if I decide to be rude here, everyone on this floor will have to come out from his or her suite to watch me display. Please stop poking your noise into my business or what I do. I don’t know why most of you women love to gossip like that. If you don’t know, gossip is a tool of the devil so find something lucrative or beneficial to do with your life.

Neighbour 2:

Don’t you dare try to open your mouth and insult me or else…

Julia:

(cuts in harshly) Or else what? Were you in any way trying to say you will beat me?

Neighbour 2:

(walking towards her) Certainly my dear. If you open that dustbin you call your mouth again I will redesign your face with my bare hands. If you don’t know me, go to Bukom and ask about Ayorkor Bruce Lee. I will beat you to death and nothing will happen. Don’t let my nice looks or dressing deceive you at all.

Julia:

(also walks to meet the lady) If you call yourself Ayorkor Bruce Lee here, then when you get to Las Vegas in the United States, ask of Julia Bruno. I like people who run their mouth and boast of their prowess in fighting because, I myself I am a street girl, and I have fought several men to get money to leave out there in the United States. You know what, this is not the place for me to read out my resume to you baby girl. Let’s get the fight rolling for us to see who the mafia here is.

Neighbour:

(comes between the two ladies) Excuse me ladies. Please this is not the time and place to do this. You can settle your scores when you two meet elsewhere, but over here, I am sorry I am not going to permit any fight or verbal abuse. Please I beg of you to let peace reign over here. The way both of you have climaxed with anger and fury I will entreat you to please listen to my plea and behave like the beautiful ladies that you are.

Neighbour 2:

Don’t address me as a lady Mister because I am not one. Give me way to pump some sense into this silly girl’s head. Who does she think she is to disturb our peace here and later invite me to a fight? Please give me way so I teach her a very small lesson.

Neighbour:

I am sorry but I won’t allow you go anywhere near to fight her. Please go back to your suite. I believe you came to lodge in this hotel to relax yourself and have some peace of mind.

Neighbour 2:

You are very right Mister, so I won’t let any bitch speak to me anyhow after she disturbed us with her uncultured behaviour.

Julia:

Mister I believe you heard the silly words that came from her rotten mouth? She had the audacity, capacity, impudence, nerves and tenacity to call me a bitch. You are wearing this cheap designer dress to stand in front of me to open your mouth up and down like a fish that needs air to breath. If I were you like I would just walk back to the room I am lodging and concentrate on whatever mission I brought to this place.

The door the lady came out from opened and an elderly Whiteman came out.

Whiteman:

Sweetheart are you still here? Please hurry up and join me inside because I am in a rush to have a piece of you.

Julia:

Heheheeee…so who is the bitch now Madam Bruce Lee? See the kettle who was laughing at the pot for being black. Ah, so upon all the young and strong white men out there, you were only able to get yourself this old man? I doubt even if he can get an erection, heheheeeeeeee

Whiteman:

Sweetheart, who is this lady and why is she insulting me? What the hell is going on here? Someone should freaking f**king tell me something because I am losing my cool.

Neighbour 2:

(tries to attack Julia but the guy who has been with them all this while intercepted) Ooh leave me and let me teach this foolish girl a lesson. How dare her throw words at my man. Does she know what I am enjoying? Idiot, silly girl you will see what I will do to you here. Now my brother, leave me alone before you also incur my wrath. It’s her I have a problem with, so please stay out of it and walk away.

Neighbour:

I won’t heed to your request madam. Sir, would you please do me a favour and get your wife out of this place for me?

Whiteman:

She is not my dream wife young man. I asked a simple question and no one here saw it prudent to answer me, and you are here asking me to send her in. What nonsense! Hey I am inside the room. When you are done embarrassing yourself, you can join me in there…I didn’t subscribe to this nonsense. I thought you were educated and civilised, but look at the way you are embarrassing yourself in public (walks back into room)

Neighbour 2:

Oh baby, wait for me. It hasn’t gotten to this my love, please wait for me so we all go in there. (runs after the whiteman)

Julia:

So who is laughing last now madam boxer? And hey stand there and listen to my little advice. Don’t go and channel all your anger on that poor old man ooo you greedy, uncultured and uncivilized bitch.

Neighbour 2:

You are very lucky today. Just thank your stars for interceding on your behalf. I doubt if you will be that lucky next time. The battle line has just been drawn between the two of us.

Julia:

Oh shut up madam old man’s girlfriend. You heard him saying you are not his wife, and I even doubt if you are his mistress or perhaps you are his sex doll? My dear get a life and find for yourself a very strong and vibrant young man to ‘grease your machine’ well for you, because you are looking rusty as at now. I will request the song “SPONSOR by EBONY” for you tomorrow at the most listened to radio station. If you have drawn the battle line, then brace yourself for a fight anytime, anywhere and anyhow because I will beat the living hell out of you.

Neighbour:

It’s okay madam, please allow sleeping dogs to lie. Ah the person who was sent to bring the master key is finally here. Hey what kept you that long?

Receptionist:

Sorry Sir, the elevator has just developed a fault so I had to use the staircase rather, and you know the floor you are on now. Ma’am I didn’t know it was your suite that had gotten the problem. I am sorry for any inconvenience caused.

Neighbour:

Hey do you know her?

Receptionist:

Of course Sir. She is the first woman to have lodged in the presidential suite of this hotel since its establishment. There you go, the door is opened ma’am. Will there be anything you want from me?

Julia:

Not at all my dear, but if something pops up I will let you know. Mmm wait and let me get something for you inside there.

Receptionist:

Oh ma’am that won’t be necessary. I only rendered a service I am being paid for, so don’t worry. If you call me ten times, I will come eleven times.

Julia:

Hahahaha you are such a funny guy, but I insist, so wait for me to get you something small.

Neighbour:

Mmmm now that the confirmation is in and your door is opened, I guess my job here is done, so let me go and check up on my little boy inside there.

Julia:

Oh forgive my manners; I was carried away with excitement as my door was opened for me. I am extremely tired and can’t wait to jump unto my bed. My name is Juliana Dotse and it was a pleasure meeting you. Thanks very much for everything you did for me; I really appreciate it so much, and I mean every word I am saying to you.

Neighbour:

I am also Kennedy Osei and you can call me Ken for short. I am glad my little effort yielded positive results. We shall meet some other time…enjoy the rest of your night.

Julia:

You too my dear and thanks again.

Julia enters her suite with a little anger in her as she speaks to herself:

Ah but does it mean Mickey has drunk himself to stupor that after all this heavy knocking he didn’t hear me? These are the kind of men who will sleep and their wives will run to another man’s room for ‘servicing’ and they will not hear it. He dare not sleep because we have an unfinished business to attend to. Hey where the heck is he? I can’t find him in the living room, neither is he in the bathroom nor the parlour or has he been captured by this man’s boys? This matter is getting a bit scary and nasty, so let me call the reception to find out if he is taking some fresh air down there or even gone to the poolside to enjoy the serenity of this great edifice.

On Phone:

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Receptionist:

Hello good evening this is Kempinski Gold Coast Hotel, how may I help you please.

Julia:

Hello I am Julia, the lady lodging at the presidential suite.

Receptionist:

Hello ma’am would you like me to get anything for you?

Julia:

Oh nothing for now but let me ask, have you seen my boyfriend around the reception or poolside area? I mean the guy that was with me when some men came looking for me at the waiting area.

Receptionist:

Oh yes ma’am, you have now given me a clearer picture of him. Yes he came to pass here in a hurry as if he was pursuing something or something was pursuing him.

Julia:

Really?

Receptionist:

Yes ma’am is anything the matter? Should I call in the security?

Julia:

Oh everything is alright here, thanks for your fabulous concern. Enjoy your evening my dear.

Receptionist:

You too ma’am. (call ends)

Julia was left in a state of pandemonium as she felt she has been treated unfairly by Mike. She bit her lips and cursed Mike for taking an august leave without any proper reason or excuse. She planned to deal rigidly with Mike later for not attending to her emotional need. She lighted a cigarette and went in for a bottle of Jack Daniels whisky to cool her temper down.

Back at Quincy’s Room:

Michael Ansah:

Ouuuch please take it easy Herty, it’s very painful.

Quincy:

My friend, keep quiet and suffer. When you were posing as Gringo in Shatta Wale’s video what were you thinking? Are you the only one here having his forehead swollen like a torchlight?

Michael Ansah:

As the rain did, so will the sun also do. I will be here to watch how you will cope with yours when the time comes and I pray Herty becomes neutral and treats yours the same way she is dealing with mine. We shall see who will laugh last over here…awww you too take it easy on me la.

Henrietta Barnor:

Be quite Mike. If I wanted you to enjoy it, I know where to touch. Did I ask you to go throwing things at each other? I am done with you for now, so apply the ointment on it and get yourself some painkillers to prevent your head from aching. Now Quincy, it is your turn, so come and sit here so I can treat yours.

Michael Ansah:

(being sarcastic) Hmmmmm we shall all see who the real man is. When the salt was laughing at the shea butter when the sun was up shinning, little did it know that it will rain after the sun shines. Killer will die in the last part of the show so I am not bothered at all. We shall see who is who over here right now.

Quincy:

Herty please don’t listen to what my enemies are saying here. I know you are professional and you will not attach any sentiments to what you are about to do. Please be gentle and very neutral over here.

Henrietta Barnor:

Can you please shut up and let me do my job? You were running your mouth when I was dealing with Mike and now that it’s your turn, you are pleading for mercy and compassion?. The way I handled Mike’s own is the same way I am going to handle yours, so brace yourself because the journey might be very rough and tough.

Quincy:

Awww please take it easy with me ooo. The way you are pressing it looks like you have a problem with me. I saw how you were dealing with Mike’s own, but with me, you have deliberately decided to go hard on me, and this is not fair ooo.

Henrietta Barnor:

Be grateful for little mercies Quincy, ‘cos for yours I am even being gentle with you. In spite of that, you are here screaming like a young guy who has just encountered his first orgasm. One more word from you and I will go hard on you over here.

Michael Ansah:

Hahahaha (obiaa wone master ampa) everyone has got his master indeed. Ebi you dey there, now run your mouth and let me see. What were you thinking when my forehead was being massaged? Were you thinking I was only screaming for fun? If you like say another word and your master will deal with you personally.

Quincy:

You devil please go behind me for I refuse to be tempted. I know Herty is going to be gentle with me and you will even feel jealous. Aaajei Herty, please be a little gentle with me or do you want me to believe that you are taking sides?

Henrietta Barnor:

To be honest with you Quincy, your forehead is twice bigger than Mike’s own, so if I try to be gentle with you, then it will be to your own detriment. Let your enemies get you today for a better tomorrow. I know what I am saying so please bear with me and endure the pain. Remember enemies are not God and they might laugh at you now but not your better tomorrow, so please let me do it the way it will favour you tomorrow.

Michael Ansah:

Hahahaha all this be lie, my brother. These are persuasive words, and she is saying all this to make you feel she is on your side. My baby girl, deal with him mercilessly and rigidly. I told him I will be the one to laugh last and he thought I was just kidding.

Henrietta Barnor:

I am done Quincy so please apply some of the ointment and take some painkillers also to ease down the pain. By tomorrow we will see some positive results. I wanted to check up on you guys and see how you were doing. I am confident you guys are very okay now and won’t throw things at each other again, so I am going back home as it is already late.

Quincy:

It’s late so why don’t you spend the night with us and leave early tomorrow morning my dear.

Michael Ansah:

You have just spoken my mind, my brother. My bae, listen to what my brother just said. Going home alone by this time is very dangerous and you know even getting a taxi from this place is another problem, so just spend the night with us.

Henrietta Barnor:

I didn’t inform my folks back home that I will be sleeping outside. I just told my mum that I was buying fried yam across the street and I ended up here. Let’s just get to the roadside first, and if after 30 minutes I don’t get a taxi, I will spend the night with you guys. And hey, are you now on the same side?

Michael Ansah:

See erh when you get to the parliament house, the minority and the majority are always not on the same side, but any time monetary issue is raised about their salaries and other emoluments, you see them at the same side, so don’t be surprised we are on the same side or am I lying my brother?.

Quincy:

You are very right my foolish brother, hehe. Three is a crowd, so start going to the roadside now to find a taxi for Herty for me. I know she won’t get one so in your absence, I will lay the bed so that when you come back from your fruitless search, you can sleep comfortably like the Queen that you are to us.

At the mansion of the Boss:

Maid:

You are welcome Sir. Please should I serve you your food now?

Boss:

Has my son eaten his food this evening?

Maid:

Erm I can’t tell Sir because I sent his food to him in his room and after that he has locked himself in his room all night long.

Boss:

Ginola the incompetent chairman, kindly summon my son for me right this very moment. I want to see how he is doing and spy on him as to whether he ate the food that he was served this evening. Hurry up on that Mister because it’s late already and I have to eat and take my medication right away.

Ginola:

I will do as instructed Boss.

Boss:

Scorpion where is the rest of the stuff we brought home?

Scorpion:

It’s in the car Boss.

Boss:

In the car doing what you idiot? Why do I pay you fools at all…you have left that expensive stuff in the car while I am here? What if someone breaks into the car and lays his hands on it? You people if you don’t man up, I will sack all of you and employ new guys to bodyguard me. Your services are no longer appealing to me and you are making me talk too much recently.

Ginola:

Boss after several knocks on Albert’s door, he said he will be with you soon.

Boss:

So why didn’t you wait for him so you come along with him? Get out of my sight right now, ’cos seeing you gives me the edge to throw up!.

Scorpion:

Boss I have brought the bag containing the stuff. Should I send it inside your bedroom?

Boss:

Keep it here at my side, I will send it inside myself when I am going upstairs. Now tell the chief maid to bring my food this very moment, because I am starving, and get me my whisky.

Albert:

Dad you are taking too much of this whisky. Don’t forget what the doctor told you the last time he came to run a check on you.

Boss:

Ah my beloved son is here finally. I was getting worried about seeing you locked up in your room like a new female bride who has been taken to her husband. Hey where is my food; the sight of my son alone has whipped up my appetite and I want to consume everything edible that is brought before me.

Scorpion:

Boss so I shouldn’t get you the whisky again?

Boss:

Ah do you know you are an embodiment of disappointment? You have a very nice way of pissing me off. Now go and get me my whisky before I descend heavily on you.

Albert:

But dad you promised to…..

Boss:

(cuts in) Stay out of this son, ‘cos some promises are made based on the condition or situation at hand. When the trap catches the prey it cries different, and when the prey gets its freedom, it also cries differently. For your sake, I will think about it or I will rather minimize the way I drink the whisky. You know you can’t stop something you are addicted to just once; it will take a while for me to stop consuming it.

Albert:

(frowns his face while talking) Daddy I don’t want to lose you anytime soon so please quit this whisky-drinking for your days to be prolonged on this earth for me.

Boss:

(laughing out loud) Hahahahahaha when you frown, your swollen mouth looks like the mother pig. This guy really gave you a beating of your life ooo…

TBC