Walking to the alter and looking into the eyes of the person before you. Their smile makes you feel you are the best person in the world. Like you are the most beautiful of all.
You smile as you take the vow.. ” I Do!” You say it without hesitation. Everyone present cheer loudly, others look at you with envy and definitely some with excitement.
Memories of my wedding day rushed through my head as I stared in the sky. Looking at nothing in particular. I sighed and grabbed the glass of lemonade on the small table besides me.
I was laying on a plastic stretcher alongside the pool. Taking a bitter reflection of my now crashed life.
There was nothing in my heart that gave me pride of what was now surrounding me. Just 5 years ago I thought I was the happiest woman alive. I was one of those people who had boasted of finding the right man, with a well paying Job. His generosity was beyond what I had imagine. He could spoil me with everything I needed as a woman.
Who wouldn’t fall in love with such a guy? Anyway I did, or at least I thought I did until when reality caught up with me.
Overtime I realised marriage wasn’t as I had anticipated. It was not all roses and kisses. Those moments when you start looking at your partner as though they are nothing but a person you lay with in bed. You ask yourself how on earth you chose them. Forgetting the first touch you had, the passion, the wonder in their smile and anything else that made sense now turn into the most irritating things in your partner’s life.
Am Stella, a secretary at a large firm in town.
I grew up on the copperbelt. Where I did my secondary school at Luanshya Girls Secondary as well as trained as a secretary at a small private school I wasn’t so proud to mention.
Since my parents couldn’t afford to pay for the reasonable courses, I had settled for a secretaliate course which I completed within 2 years.
Lucky for me My connected boyfriend, now husband Chris Sichone hooked me up to a big firm dealing with supplying of large machines and equipments to other firms.
Soon after our marriage, Chris and I had settled in Lusaka were he found me a job.
Chris was a business man he bought and supplied vehicle spare parts and cars from outside the country.
I was over heels for him within the 6 months that we dated. He was charming, jovial and so lovely he made my knees go weak every time he kissed me. His help in terms of finances to my family really won me over. I knew I found him and my parents loved him to the core.
If not for my uncle who insisted on charging more money for my pride price, my parents could have given me off to him free of charge.
I had scolded them for telling me they would only charge him a small fee since the guy was already being helpful.
“You don’t have to show your desperation for marrying me off. I can stand head high. Am still young and beautiful” I blushed standing up and turning around for my mother who smiled.
“I know my dear. You are the Apple of my eye!” She chuckled bouncing her shoulder with pride.
To cut the story short, things went on well and Chris and I married barely 6 months after our courtship.
I discovered later on that Chris wasn’t the person I thought he was. To start with, he was a womanizer and drinking was his second talent.
Overtime I thought he was going to change but I was so wrong. My husband practically forgot being a husband to me and all he did was shower me with money.
Things got worse when I couldn’t give him a child. He practically ignored my existence. Coming home late hours and sometimes sleeping out.
One day I just decided I was tired of waiting for him to grow up like people used to tell me he would. I was tired of sleeping in bed alone and longing for my husband to touch me.
Bravely I had waited for him to return from his outings and made him sit down in our bed.
” Chris” I started calmly.
” I have seen how much you love your women out there and are always out either on a business trip, with your friends or girlfriends drinking. Today I want you to know that am tired of all this. I will not cry for you anymore.”
” Okey, am listening ” he said surely untouched by my complaints.
He had made it clear that I was somehow to blame for his behaviour. He told me I was so nagging and I didn’t give him the respect he derseved as a man.
” i am setting you free Chris. I want you to continue exploring and doing whatever it is you have been doing over the years. I won’t give a damn how you will Live your life from now on. Provided you let me live mine too”
I watched his facial expression to see if there was any pain or remorse in his eyes. But all I could see was clear unconcern. It was like my words didn’t even get to his ears.
” whatever!” He answered rudely
” What? Just That? Thats all you are going to say you son of a bi…” I couldn’t finish my sentence and I saw him stand up shooting me with his now red eyes.
” you are a mad woman, stop bothering me already and do whatever the hell you please. And dont you dare insult my mother. I swear on her grave I will make sure you eat back your words” he snared and walked out on me leaving me with my mouth open.
I slowly walked to the wardrobe, Opened the first drawer and removed my wedding ring placing it carefully like it would break.
” well Stella, you are now a single woman. You are free and this marks the beginning of your free life” I sighed and took out a bottle of beer Chris had left, drinking it’s content like I was a professional. No one would tell it was the first beer I was taking my entire life.
Here I am now a year later.. on a Saturday afternoon. The October heat scorching my skin I was now contemplating going back in the swimming pool.
” Hey beautiful!” I heard a man’s voice calling me out. I turned my head towards the man and he smiled showing off his white moustache.
Quickly I checked out his skin tone. Realising it was so smooth and mild. I smiled back.
” now this is a man worthy my smile ” i thought to myself and stood up leaving the towel which was wrapped around my waist deliberately on the pool chair I had lay on.
I saw him lick his lips and biting it lustfully.
My eyes went direct at his wrist watch, a genuine Gold Rolex watch..
” hey handsome” I smiled widely. ” so are you married,” I asked making his face turn downwards instantly.
” Don’t worry you can ignore that question. I was just pulling your leg” I let a small laugh. His face had already given him away. Especially that he tried to hide his finger where the wedding ring was. He was my exact target.
Am sure now people are wondering what the hell a married woman is doing flirting with a man in her swim suit.
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Well, lets just say I found myself a better way of relieving my frustrations. I wasn’t going to sit and make myself miserable just because my marriage was failing.
My mission was simple. I planned to teach some married men some good lessons such that when I was done. Those who were sensible enough would never look at another woman besides their wife.
” So are we swimming or you are going to keep staring at me ?” I finally asked the man before me.
He shrugged. ” I thought you would never invite me ”
” come in Mr, I flashed him a smile and went diving into the pool. It was quite a private place and wasn’t so clouded. Just the way i liked it.
I had gone there as was my new trend of going to places were some well established people were found. I knew one uncontented b****** would approach me.
I made sure I used up all the money I got from the men I met to take care of myself. My skin was so smooth I had no problems walking around in my bikin. My hair was always on point, not to talk of my dress code.
After Swiming with the man who I now came to know as James Kaluwe, a bank manager at Barclays bank. I let him hold me around.
When I was satisfied he had his between thigh friend pointed out, I walked out of the pool and threw the towel on my shoulder heading to the rooms to change into my clothes.
I just finished dressing when he emerged, his desire for me writen all over his face.
I was sure he thought he was going to feed his down friend but I decline his demands and instead left my card.
” another time handsome, I got to go now” I sighed looking at my phone. ” something came up so I got to go” I added kissing his cheek and leaving him standing like a log.
Getting home, i found Chris seated in the living room his phone in his hands. I called out a greeting and went in the bathroom.
I had to make sure he saw me walk in and then go to the bathroom so that he would start imagining what was causing me to take a bath after being out for hours.
I sat in my towel at the couch opposite him eating the cornflakes I just made for myself.
” So how was your day Chris?” I smiled looking at him.
He lifted his eyes from the phone and shook his head. ” like you care you hypocrite!” He snapped angrily.
I let a laugh and lifted my hands in surrender. ” My bad, I should have read that my dear Hubby isn’t in the mood today” I said calmly and went back to crunching my cornflakes.
Enjoying the crunchness and the cold milk I had added to them.
I saw Chris steal some glances at me as I smiled and made some small giggling noise while I chatted on my phone.
After some minutes I heard him cursing but I was not paying attention to him. He stood up and walked out after grabbing the keys from the table.
The door out slammed loudly making me startle a little.
I shook my head proudly. Chris was getting exactly were I wanted him to be and I was enjoying myself to the maximum.
I put down my phone and started searching through the channels for something to watch. Came across a movie called ” diary of a mad black woman ” I had watched it several times but I wanted to watch it again. The part were the wife mistreated the husband after he was involved in some shoot out was my favourite. I just loved the desperate look of the man especially when she eat in front of him.
I sighed and placed my legs on top of the couch ready to relax myself.