At the receptionist desk, he dropped the room card and then made the way out of the hotel to where his car was parked.
Since it was still dawn, it was still a little bit dark outside.
During the whole drive, even though I kept casting curious glances at him, he kept on looking straight ahead, ignoring my presence.
It was the same thing when we got home and I could feel my patience running out.
“Why are you not saying anything to me?” I asked him as we entered the house.
He acted instead like he didn’t hear me. Knowing I had been patient enough, I grabbed his hand to stop him, just for him to give me a deadly glare, the kind I hadn’t gotten from him in months.
I didn’t have to be told to withdraw my hand before I did and then, he continued the walk to our room.
I was beyond shocked.
He was seated on the edge of the bed when I entered the room, with my bag beside him and the divorce papers I got from my lawyer in his hand.
That explained why he was cold towards me.
“Divorce papers uh?” He asked.
How come I didn’t remember I had them in my bag all along.
“What is this about?”
I didn’t say anything.
“You want a divorce, why?”
I closed my eyes for a second to think of what to say but I couldn’t think of anything.
“Why aren’t you saying anything?” He asked.
That was when I made up my mind to do it even though all I wanted to be able to do that moment was to be able to tear the divorce papers into shreds which I couldn’t do.
I mustered courage.
“I got tired of you.” I said.
He seemed taken aback by my words.
“I want a divorce because I got tired of you.” I would love to avoid eye contact with him but I couldn’t.
If I do that, he might suspect I was being forced to do it, so I maintained eye contact with him.
He got to his feet and walked over to where I was.
“You getting withdrawn from me, was this what it was all about?” He questioned.
“Yes.” I held back a tear.
“Hazel,” His face was set in a frown but his tone was pleading.
“Are you not happy being with me? Do you think I am cheating on you, if you think I am, I…”
“No.” I shook my head.
“It is no use talking to you right now, you don’t seem to be in your right mind.”
“I am. I am in my right mind and if you want me to be happy… you will sign that.”
“That is what you want?”
“Yes.” I made sure to look determined though I could tell myself I was dying inside.
Without saying anything further, he walked over to the side table and grabbing the pen that was lying on it, signed the papers.
Done with that, he took his jacket, his car key and left the room, slamming the door behind him.
Then, I slumped to the ground and I couldn’t stop the tears from streaming out anymore, my heart was aching so badly.
I was sobbing loudly now.
I was the one who filed the divorce paper but I felt like it was the other way round.
I had never felt the kind of sadness and sorrow I felt that day since the death of Andrew.