My father’s heart attack scared the s*** out of me but it was established that it was only a minor attack. I stayed with him the rest of the day, forgetting about Jude Howard. He was still weak and could barely talk, madame Han and her rapist son were there too
Tae Ho “its nice to see you again Yoona, father told us you patched things up”
Her “yes…now we can be a proper family again”
Me “I have no interest in becoming family with you at all! So please, dont talk to me”
Tae Oh tried to touch me Tae Oh “you know you always look so beautiful when you’re angry” I grabbed his arm and twisted it, he cried out in pain
Me “and you’ve always been such a weakling” I gave him a half evil smile “what did I say about you putting your dirty hands on me?”
Her “ya…what the heck do you think you’re doing? Let him go!”
Tae Oh “ouch ouch ouch!! Aaaahhh!” He cried out louder as I twisted his arm a little more, finally I let go of his arm and his mom ran to him.
Me “thats right…you remember that pain you’re feeling next time you want to get friendly with me! Like I said…I have no interest in becoming family with you! So please, leave me the **** alone!” Then I turned to leave, I was going to see my dad the following day
The next day I went to see my father before going to work. He was awake and doing so much better. I went to hug him
Father “oooohhh! Its okay honey, I’m okay”
Me “you scared me! Why arent you taking better care of your health?!”
Father “I thought I was!”
Father “I’m sorry sweetheart” I sulked
Me “do I have to get you out of that house to make sure you never come here again? Apa…take care of yourself chaebal!!” (Chaebal means thank you) “stop working so hard…why dont you give a bulk of your work to Tae Oh and just take some time off?”
Father “you think so?”
Me “yes! You really scared me” he laughed “its not father dad!”
Father “I’m just happy, to see how much you worry about me, I never thought I’d see that side of you again”
Me “you’re still my father arent you? I love you”
Father “I love you too” I hugged him again, I started crying, I dont know why but I just felt a heaviness in my heart “whats wrong Yoona? Did something happen?” I shook my head
Me “I cant lose you too dad”
Father “You wont I promise sweetheart”
Me “I already lost Jude Howard dad and now if I lose you too….” I broke off, he held me tighter
Father “what happened with Jude honey?” I sat up and wiped my tears
Me “dad, dont angry…it wasnt planned, I dont know how it happened…okay I know how but it was so unexpected…I….”
Father “whats wrong Yoona? You can tell me anything”
Me “I’m pregnant” dead silence followed…..”Jude and I had just started dating but everything went south when his friends came to visit, we had a huge fight and we havent patched things up because I pushed him away, scared that I might hurt, I pushed him away and blocked him from getting close to me because I am messed up on the inside and now I have this baby, I’m scared to go to his house and find him with some other girl…then he tells me he’s moved on and doesnt want me or the baby! I dont know what to do!” I bit my lower lip and looked at my dad who didnt say anything “Apa…..?”
Father “aaahhh okay….sweetheart I know that its hard, its never easy to love someone but if you really love him then you should drive yourself crazy with the what ifs and just go there and tell him how you feel. You cant just assume things about a person especially how they feel, he may still love but you pushed him away so he’s taking a step back”
Father “yes, you love him dont you?” I nodded “then go tell him before its too late” I smiled and stood up
Me “you’re not mad about the baby?” He smiled
Father “its my grandchild, why would I be mad?” I bent down and hugged him
Me “thank you so much father, thank you!!” I kissed him on the cheek then ran out, I wasnt even gonna go to work…I was going straight to Jude Howard’s house….. . . .
My father and I were leaving for the States around 1pm in the afternoon, I had already spoken to my friends and they were sad about me going back to the States, especially Yoo Hye Jung but as time passes by, priorities change. When I came to Korea, I was convinced that my life was here but now, no matter how I looked at it, there was nothing keeping me here, it was time to move on to the next chapter of my life.
Around 11:30 we prepared to leave for the airport because we didnt want Gangnam traffic to delay us then we miss our flight. I dragged mine and Reign’s bags out to the lounge then called out my dad
Me “dad come on! We have to get moving!”
Dad “be right down son!” I put Reign on the couch then the front door flung open
Me “Yoona?” She stood before me and I couldnt believe it was her, she had tears in her big eyes and was she gaining weight? “What are…what are you doing here?”
Yoona “Jude.. I have been such an idiot…I dont know what happened, I just got scared and my first instinct was to run..you hurt me and I got scared that maybe if I carried on with you…with us…I’d get even more hurt because I love you so much and I wanted this so badly…I felt it was unnatural to love someone so much so I ran…I pushed you away because I got scared” I was still shocked, Yoona was in my house and mostly shocked at her words, I was convinced she had moved on but then again there she was, telling me she loved me
Yoona “I know that I hurt you too by pushing you away, I dont know what you’re thinking right now but I love you…and I….”
Dad “okay! Ready to go!” We both turned to look at him coming down the stairs, I looked back at Yoona and she returned the look with a confused one
Dad “oh my! Who is this Korean beauty?” I scratched my head
Me “uh dad…this is Seo Yoona” Reignie was busy trying to get off the couch because she badly wanted to come to Yoona
Me “uh yeah, he found me and came to Korea”
Yoona “oh thats great”
Dad “am I interrupting something? Jude, we must get going son”
Yoona “you’re leaving?”
Dad “oh yes…didnt he tell you the good news? He’s going back to New York with me” Yoona gasped
Yoona “back to New York?”
Me “its only for like a week, to meet the family and everyone”
Dad “before he goes back permanently” dammnit! My dad was just f****** things up each second he opened his mouth Angus “Mr Gheller, the car is ready”
Dad “Jude, you will speak to your friend when you get back, we must get going” I looked at Yoona, she was about to cry and it broke my heart
Yoona “so you were going to leave without telling me?”
Me “its not like that Yoona…I just thought…”
Dad “Jude….” he tapped his watch
Me “just give me a second dad please!” I looked at Yoona, tears fell down her cheeks and we were really pressed for time
Me “I’ll be back and we can talk when I get back I promise”
Yoona “you’re really going to leave?”
Me “I’ll be back I promise, everything has already been planned and I want to meet the family” I went to take Reign from the couch
Yoona “I’m pregnant” I my heart stopped for a second, I slowly turned to look at her “I’m 10 weeks pregnant with your baby”
Yoona “I said I’m pregnant” I almost dropped Reign but Yoona quickly grabbed her and she went crazy with the baby talk, Yoona smiled and kissed her all over as she giggled and hid in her hair “I missed you so much baby and I will miss you even more when you’re gone” I couldnt function, trying to wrap my head around the fact that Yoona was pregnant, I was going to be a father again
Me “you’re pregnant?” I finally said, she looked at me
Yoona “I’m sorry I didnt tell you sooner, I just had a lot to think about…”
Me “you’re pregnant….” she nodded, I walked towards her and put my hand on her stomach “little Jude?” She chuckled
Yoona”yes” I smiled at the thought, so many good things happened in such a short space of time, I met my father, my girl came back to me and she was pregnant! I had…I found my reason to stay in Korea . I dipped my head and kissed her, she returned it and Reign was screaming and shouting happily. she was going to be an older sister, I a father and finally Yoona and I together!! . . .
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I was happy, pregnant with the baby of the man I loved and back in the house where I belonged. Jude had gone to the States after I convinced him to go with his dad so he could meet his family, he came back home after a week. He was over the moon about the baby, he met my dad and though he wasnt strict with him, he said we should get married because it was wrong that we were going to have a baby and living together. I wanted marriage, being with Jude is what I wanted but I wasnt sure he felt the same way because after meeting my dad and him talking marriage, he seemed a bit off and I just knew my dad had scared him with the whole thing.
Weeks went by, the weeks piled on and I was slowly getting out of my first trimester, I was happy about that cos I was tired of the crappy morning sickness.
Jude was with me every step of the way, waking up in the middle of the night to make me food, bringing me lunch at work, tolerating all my mood swings but those werent bad, I just ate a lot and I was gaining the weight too, for someone who used to be super slender, I was putting on weight, I didnt hate that…I was just happy I had my life back on track.
Jude decided not to move back to America and his dad supported that but made us promise we’d visit once the baby is born, we had no problem with that. I’d never keep Jude away from his family….
I came back from work one night, at the door, I was met by an arrow of red rose petals leading outside to the pool garden. I put my bags down and followed the trail, Jude was standing next to the table that had a romantic setting, I smiled
Me “what is this?”
Jude “welcome home baby ” he walked to me and gave me a single rose, I took it
Me *smiling* “thank you” I looked at him, searching his eyes
Jude “from the first day I saw you, I felt strongly attracted to the beautiful big eyes stranger who stole my wallet” I chuckled “I just knew I had to keep you by my side and never let you go, I always wanted to be near you, even though you kept saying you didnt need saving, I kept wanting to be your safe place, the place where you can find peace and feel safe and protected. This strong, head strong, stubborn and prideful woman…I used to ask myself just how was I going to make that heart of iron melt…you were hurt and disappointed, even though you tried to hide it, it often showed that you’re actually a big softie inside, the way you love the people around you, the sweet and caring side of you, the funny side of you, the side that loves to laugh and make jokes, the side that loves and takes care of my daughter like she was your own, the side that is a mother to our child and the side that learned how to love me…these are all the things that make up Seo Yoona…not the pain you went through, the anger you harboured, the hatred that took over your life…it is your heart that was able to heal and find its freedom that forms part of the beautiful Korean Chaebol I fell in love with.
There is no going back now baby, its me, you and our kids…this is our life now and how I want it to always be” Tears welled up in my eyes and I felt a lump in my throat, Jude Howard always knew exactly what to say…he went down on one knee, taking out a black box from his pocket and opened it, a large diamond ring sparkled up at me, the tears pushed past my lashes one by one and fell down my cheeks
Jude “Seo Yoona….will you marry me?” I nodded quickly, not trusting my voice. He slipped the ring into my finger then got up and kissed me “you’ll really marry me?”
Me “ofcourse I will!” I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him again . . . 8 months later……. Jude and I were happily married, living in our beautiful house with our daughter who was already a year old. I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy Min Ho Howard, we decided to give him a Korean name but his dad also named him Nathaniel.
After everything that happened, the hurt we went through, the disappointments we experienced, everything led us to that moment…a life where we were happy and made peace with the world for letting us down before but eventually we had everything…friends and family
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