Not so many years ago, I didn’t know there were such things as introversion or extroversion. I just wanted to be popular. I wanted to communicate easily, make jokes, and easily understand people. I called that “sociability.”
Though I didn’t succeed in talking to guys I liked or to strangers, I was pretty comfortable communicating with my closest friends. So, when I learned the word extrovert, I thought I was one. It made me happy, and I kept telling everyone how matey I was.
But the happiness didn’t last long. One day, when my closest friend (who had a psychology background) said to me, “You’re a classic introvert,” I was surprised and confused. But I was in my teens, and introversion sounded like a cool way to differentiate myself, so I wasn’t too broken up about it. So, before too long, I started telling everyone I was an introvert.
Until, you know, I grew up.
Over the years, I met a lot of introverts who looked at life very differently than I did.
I met a lot of true extroverts whose rambunctious energy absorbed an environment in seconds.
And I began to understand that I was somewhere in the middle. I’m actually an ambivert, and that’s OK, too.
It made finding the right partner a bit tricky, though.
I don’t know why I was always attracted to extroverted men. No, that’s not true. I do know. We all know. They are charming, commanding, open, and confident.
But someone saved me. The man who became my husband turned out to be a true introvert. Strangers don’t get him. They think he’s shy and nervous or standoffish and aloof. But they don’t see what I see.
Here are a few of the things I love about being married to an introvert:
1. Incredible intimacy
Introverts don’t dole out their love to just anyone. They have strong boundaries with their colleagues; they don’t tell secrets to acquaintances. They keep their affection for those closest to them, for the people they really trust.
You won’t have to share the introvert with a ton of other people. You’ll never feel like there’s a competition you need to win. It will be obvious that you are their No. 1.
Being close to an introvert means you’ll feel loved and special all the time. You’ll be the keeper of that person’s most intimate experiences.
2. Inner freedom
Introverts tend to hold their inner child close and only set them free around the people they feel truly comfortable with. This spontaneous, playful, creative person reveals themselves to you more and more over time, giving you something new to appreciate every day. Introverts tend to retain the purity of soul that most of us lose over time.
3. Your home as a fortress
Indeed, home for introverts is the fortress where they can hide from the outside world and truly be themselves.
To enter this fortress, you need to earn the introvert’s trust. But once you’re in, you’ll feel completely at home. Everyone has their own space in an introvert’s fortress. Introverts understand the need for personal space better than anyone else.
4. Entry to a magical world of possibility
Introverts live in fairy-tale worlds. They create thousands of universes in their minds, but they don’t share them with others very often. That means their imaginations are full of magic. You’ll never be bored in an introvert’s company. Their minds overflow with ideas and questions. They’re insatiably curious.
As far as you are supportive, they will be open to guiding you through the world of their dreams. They’ll invite you into their world, and if you cherish it as it should be cherished, they will love you forever.
5. Absolute devotion
Introverts pick and choose their closest friends very carefully. Once they’ve brought you into the fold, they’ll be by your side as long as you’ll let them.
They prefer to spend time with you one on one, rather than in big groups. Even when they decide to spend time with their friends, they prefer to have you there. They feel supported and safe when you’re around. At the same time, they’ll never infringe on your freedom or private space.
When you are married to an introvert, you really feel like you’re two halves of the same whole—but still individuals. You need each other. Your world is your own, you follow your own rules, and the two of you know it is something special. It is a sacrament no one else can partake in.