I got home that day and felt pains on my body. I felt my sex organ hurt badly. It was like a rope was strapped to my penis and pulled by a horse. There was a burning sensation inside of me. My thighs on which Madam Amaka’s buttocks kept rotating on hurt me badly.
While my parents watched super story on our local network, I stood up to drag myself to my room.
“Wale where are you going to?” My mother asked.
“I am going to my bed mummy.”
“Isn’t it so early. Are you not going to watch your program today?”
I glanced at the television and shook my head. Nothing interested me that evening. I felt different. It was like I had lost my self.
“No ma. I will watch it next week.” I replied.
“Leave him, he wants to run from the network news. He knows that after this program comes the network news. Wale doesn’t like news eh. If it is cartoon or zee world, you will see him seated like a robot and watching it with his eyes, body, soul and spirit. Go and sleep abeg.” Papa said waving me off with his hands.
I turned to leave when Mama called me back. I walked up to her, sheepishly dragging my feet feebly towards her. Mama drew me close to her and robbed my head with her left hands.
“Wale are you sure that you are fine? Eh? My boy. What is wrong? Tell mummy. Did mummy Amaka beat you today?”
I shook my head immediately.
“Did she scold you for something you did wrong?”
“No mummy. She didn’t.” I replied.
“Look I have told you to always allow Wale stay in the house. So we know what is wrong with him. Instead you allow him to roam around other people houses.” Papa spoke
“Ah ah. Papa Wale. Who is every body house again na? Is it Mummy Amaka that is now everybody? Eh? You know that is the only place you can find Wale if he is not at home. And Mummy Amaka takes good care of him. He is just moody today that’s all.”
Papa heaved a sigh. He shook his head countless number of times without uttering a word. Instead, he shook his legs like late grand pa would.
“Wale what did you do in Mummy Amaka’s house today?” Papa asked.
“Nothing papa. We just slept and ate and watched TV.”
“Did you have a good time there?”
I paused for a while and nodded my head slightly.
“Did you have a good time? If you didn’t tell us now so that we would know. We can get you someone to stay at home with you during your holiday period. My friend speak up.” Papa shouted.
“Papa I had a good time. I am just tired.” I said softly.
“Oya go and sleep. Go.” Mama beckoned. “Pray before you sleep you hear?” Mama added.
Mama had noticed that the question was getting intense. Papa was now taking everything personal. He seemed like one who must have had a bad day at work. I was thankful that Mama had just saved me from further question and answer session.
I dragged my legs feebly as I walked to my room. That night, I laid on my bed like a vegetable. I was tired. I could not join them in watching what seemed to be my favourite program on the local network.
For the first time in a long while, I went to bed on my own without waiting to be forced or carried by my father. No wonder my parents had to find out if I was actually okay.
I laid on my bed with my back and my eyes looking aimlessly at the ceiling. I thought about what had transpired between Madam Amaka and I. I thought about the whole massage. I thought about the urine that she had poured out on my body that afternoon.
Somehow, somewhere deep inside of me, I knew it was not right. I felt guilty. So much guilt in me. But then, I felt pain; tremendous pain.
I could not say a word. I could not tell my mother what had happened. I could not mention it to my father either.
My mother was a good friend of Madam Amaka. She trusted Madam Amaka so much. Telling her was only going to destroy their friendship. I didn’t want to be the reason my mother had an enemy. Most especially, I doubted my mother would even believe me in the first place. She had no reason to. She spoke well of Madam Amaka. She held her in high esteem.
My father on his own side was a strict person. He would have been the one I would have talked to if I had a chance. It was only my father who never completely trusted Madam Amaka from the onset. He had always complained about her being too holy, and over prayerful for his liking.
But then, my Father was a father I feared so much. Whenever I did wrong, or offended mummy, he was used as a punishing weapon. Mama will reported my wrong to him, and he never failed to use the rod on me. It was a black long whip. Twelve strokes was the least he would flog me whenever I did wrong.
His whip was his correcting fluid. I am not surprised about my fathers ability to flog. What else did I expect from a father who had been a teacher for twenty years, and now a serving principal of a school for close to six years.
I feared his whip the most. At the sight of papa I ran to my room and climbed my bed. During exams, I ran to grab my books pretending to read if I was not already reading.
Mama was not left out. She fears him too. But somehow, she knows his soft spot and would always find a way to use it on him.
Only God knows what would become of me if I tell papa what Madam Amaka had done to me. He would blame me for allowing myself to be used like a toy. He would blame Mama for allowing me to visit her house despite his warnings. Mama and papa would both fight and I would be held responsible for the result of my own actions.
I was not ready to leave with that guilt. I was not ready to be the cause of any fight between Madam Amaka and my parents.
It was now obvious that I was going to be living with my small secrete for a very long time. I was now going to be facing my problems alone.
I took a quick peep at my penis which was now shrunken and lifeless. I robbed it with my hands and felt a rough cut. I was injured from the continuous brush and strain during the act. I had not felt it all this while until now. I let out a painful tear and wiped it off immediately.
Tomorrow promises yet another time with Madam Amaka, and there would be obviously many more days to come.
I hugged my pillow, whispered a short prayer to myself, and dozed off to a land of sweet dreams.
To be continued…