Now, Two women, same man. Or one woman same man, depends on how you want to see it or put it” she states.
But there was dead silence..
“Wait, are you being serious. That my friend Sophia here is a mental case? And that she and Bella are one and the same? Really did you drink some vodka before you came here because you sound stupid”.
Rebecca points at her shaking her head. This was becoming disturbing by the minute. She shakes her head again.
“What are you saying doctor, that that… I am crazy? How can she be me? How can you speak of two different lives now and still collapse it into one. What the hell is the matter with you? Adams is this what you wanted me to hear? This trash”
“Sophia for God’s sake and for everything you hold dear, listen please. This is the truth I have been trying to say” he speaks softly to her. A second ago she remained calm, letting him hold her, now she was getting angry again.
“No you shut up Adams because you both planned this messed up pep talk. Now am done.” Sophia cuts in.
No this didn’t make sense. She shook her head. No it didn’t
The doctor continues talking…
“Symptoms include the presence of two or more distinct personality states, accompanied by the inability to recall personal information accurately , beyond what is expected through normal forgetfulness and also loss of identity as related to individual distinct personality states, and loss referring to time, sense of self and consciousness, amnesia , waking up at odd hours or different places, can’t tell a time difference, seeing themselves in another and actually acting like someone totally different and not being aware.. .. Sometimes this is caused by childhood replace the words $3x with $3xual and/or physical abuse, though not always.
Sophia you were molested as a child by your uncle. A memory you pushed and blocked away after he died, before you went to college. As a child, because you couldn’t talk to your parents about it, you created an imaginary friend; Bella. This Bella who was just a fictional character in your head became your best friend. Your ally. Your confidant. And eventually she became you. Separately from you.
Often times you were Sophia and other times you became Bella and over time you couldn’t tell one from the other. Your parents were aware of these but never really saw the harm in it. So they indulged you, and as you grew up, you became Sophia and then you became Bella and then Sophia and then Bella again etc.
People tend to have more than 2 personalities even up to a hundred. But in your case it’s just two. You and Bella.
Now, these identities may be unaware of each other and not compartmentalize knowledge and memories, resulting in chaotic personal lives,
The primary identity, which often has the patient’s given name, eg.. Sophia tends to be “passive, dependent, guilty and depressed or calm, sweet natured” with the other personalities being more active, eg Bella, aggressive or hostile, more determined, focused , fierce in character and often containing a current time line that lacks childhood accurate memory” She states..
“Causes are not known but one stands out; Trauma. Your molestation as a child brought Bella, and over time you suppressed her and then February 4th, 2010 another trauma, and then Bella reappears. You try to block out the pain and the Memories.
Then they replace the words $3x with $3xual, physical, or psychological trauma in childhood has been proposed as an explanation for its development; awareness, memories and emotions of harmful actions or events caused by the trauma are removed from consciousness, and alternate personalities or sub personalities form with differing memories, emotions and behaviour thus… Bella !!”
“What happened in February? What are you saying?” Sophia head hurts, It hurts, the pain intensifies
“Our daughter Sophia, Our daughter lily!” Adams cries, he brings out his wallet, opens it and there a smiling innocent face stares up at him as he held onto her and an equally smiling Sophia stared adoringly into her face too
“Our baby, died. She was five Sophia, Beautiful like you, an angel… Our angel” he sobbed
Rebecca blinks. Shocked.
Sophia aghast, shocked, she shakes her head, turning her head from side to side
“No. No. No no no no no No!!!” She repeats and keeps repeating closing her ears, refusing to believe. Rejecting. Denying.
“No no no no!!” She cries
Rebecca picks up the dropped wallet and she looks at the picture. Yes, there were three smiling faces, one breath-taking was a child’s. A replica of Sophia and loved poured from her parents eyes. It was evident.
This can’t be true. No, she never knew Sophia had a child, Let anyone one who was five and then died.
Or was it the period she went away. Married to her husband and relocated to the Dubai. For a couple of years and they lost contact till not a few years ago after years of trying to find out where Adams was. She moves back here just to be with him and her mission of separating them begin to take shape.
“But.. Sophia never mentioned this..” she trails off..
“That’s because she blocked it out. It was too painful. It broke her, Shattered her and the only way she could deal was to block it, forget it, poof, gone, like it never happened and the only way to deal was for her to let her alter ego dominate, while her primarily personality goes to the background. Thus her constant headaches, Amnesia, Sleepy spells, sometimes denial. Waking up confused and wondering a thousand miles away from where she is. Being Bella and completely unaware”
“No no no no no no you .. no. Stop stop stop talking ” she whispers holding her head, Adams crawls to her
“B-but tell me, those pictures. How do you explain them because on some of those days I was with Sophia? So how come Bella was there too. The hotel room,? those pictures doctor. Explain that shit since you are so intelligent because I still don’t believe it”
No, this can’t be true they needed to tell her something that made sense.
“When Sophia has her headaches and twitching eyes, it’s Bella knocking. Trying to take over. To dominate. Her sleepy spells and her eventual giving in to sleep. She wakes up not as Sophia but as Bella. So one minute she is Sophia with you. And next minute she leaves, maybe that second she collapses, faints or even sleeps off. She wakes up as Bella and what does Bella want the most in this world? Adams. So she goes to find him, be with him. So let’s say at the hotel you both went there together and left together?”
“No, she got there before me and left before me”
“OK. Did you stay there afterwards for a long time?
“Er.. no. I went home immediately. I only came back much later to find out about Adams and his mistress leaving”
“Exactly. Say in the space of few minutes. Sophia ends up falling asleep on the wheels, or drives up to a restaurants and doses for even a split second. It takes a few seconds for that door to open and Bella steps in. And when she wakes up she doesn’t know who Sophia is. She sees herself, yes she gets confused too how she got to where she is. Why she is wearing a dress or where she is coming from. She too is confused. But the only safe place and who she knows is Adams so she goes back to the place they both meet… Which of course is the hotel. She calls him and messages him. The name on her phone is stored “Mr W” she calls him “Mr W” as Bella sometimes, same as Sophia so nothing is amiss. And when Adams meets her, knowing the truth. He says nothing. She is his wife after all, he loves her. So he lets her believe whatever she believes knowing the truth of it all would break her as it did once before knowing due to the reason. So morning or afternoon he goes to her when she calls. At night, he goes home to his wife, knowing she would be home already forgotten about what transpired between them, not knowing they had met earlier, and Sophia who somehow after he leaves maybe slumps somewhere .. Sleeps off, takes a drive and her headaches comes… etcetera. She wakes up and finds herself home… confused. She doesn’t remember how she got there.
Do you understand now?” The doctor finishes looking at Rebecca and then at Sophia. .she speaks to her directly.
“Your parents died. You had to heal to deal… you created Bella. Your uncle molested you. You had to heal and deal… you let Bella. Your ch-child died Sophia. Lily, she died right in front of you, you broke. It shattered you. You wanted to die to. You tried. Adams saved you but you were all gone. Lost. Living but …you weren’t yourself. And when he saw you walk through that elevator one day… and you introduced yourself as Bella.
He didn’t know what to do to shake you out of it. He cried. He was broken and because of your pain and what you have been through I knew you needed to heal. To deal and shaking you out of it forcefully would damage you for life. I did the only thing I knew how to, despite going against my ethics. I told him… let her be who she wants to be. Let her. Just love her the same. Whether she is Bella or Sophia she is still the same. Let her heal. Let her deal. And that’s what he did. Loving you in your different and confused states and fighting the urge trying not to hurt you or her or you both. Sophia, the death of you child devastated you. ”
“Sophia?”
Rebecca stood there speechless as everything begins to fall into place. Sophia complaining of headaches. In college, often times Sophia had acted as though she didn’t know who she was and asked her to introduce herself and she had hated her for making her feel unimportant. Those times she complained of not knowing how she got home. Everything fell into place. The hotel, that girl mentioning that Sophia was the mistress. No wonder Peter kept trying to get her attention, he was shocked seeing Sophia.
‘Sophia” Adams calls her again breaking into Rebecca’s thoughts
“No no no. No.. I never had a daughter. She never died. I never had a daughter. No she never died. ”
Adams gets up to the other room, forces a drawer open, throws out all the cloths there and pulls out a box. He brings it to her… he opens it and pours the contents to the ground. She gasps. Rebecca blinks…
Sophia sieves through. There were pictures of her, lily. As a baby, in the hospital. As a toddler, making her first walk. Of all three of them at the park, of she and Adams sleeping, of her lily and Sophia, having a pool bath. Lots of pictures of happy memories… tears streaming down her eyes. Rebecca picks a picture, staring in disbelieve.
“I-I don’t believe this!”
“No no no-no it can’t be. This can’t be” Sophia cries…
“My head, my chest, Hurts” she drops the pictures and holds onto her head. Adams pulls her to himself, rocking her… his tears mixing with hers…
“Then, then… If you are saying that is true… then why didn’t Adams say anything… to anybody, to me… to her eventually?’
No, Rebecca didn’t want to believe just yet. This had to be a lie somehow. See shook her head.
“Because at that time she was too delicate. Fragile. It would have caused more harm than good. Having people point and stare at her. Feel pity for her and what if someone tells her and wasn’t careful. Too many implications, health implications that could go wrong for her. Denial. Rejection, Depression in extreme cases, Death. All this could happen and before you know it, it’s too late to save her from herself. She had had too many bad memories. Her parents, her uncle and then her little baby, Lily. Gone. It was too much.
So, like I said, and when he met Bella for the first time… in that hotel, Sophia had called him telling him she wanted to see him and when he got there… he saw his wife yes… But she looked different, classier, and bolder, Feisty. Different but the same. And when she introduced herself as Bella. . He knew… he couldn’t tell her. And thus he pretended not to know her. He couldn’t tell no one. He tells his doctor, me, which was the right thing to do. And because she was his wife, his love, only lover, being with her intimately was no crime. Continuing in the love affair wasn’t wrong. He wasn’t cheating. He was with his wife even if she didn’t know it. Because I knew her case already, having read her files… going against my ethics, knowing that she was in a very delicate state… There was no harm in continuing, for it acted as an antidote to the present situation… a healing process for her, that was the only way.
Bella is Sophia as Sophia is Bella. Ever wondered what those initials stands for? The necklace around her neck?
1. B.W? It’s Sophia BellaLyne Wellington. Bella for short. Same necklace the same lady had on in the pictures. Same cut she had on her hand in the last picture and plaster. Same cut and plaster Sophia has on her hands as well. Same long delicate red nails she loves to keep. Same smile. Same person. Different personalities. But same love for one man. Same force, same Pull, same woman. The other woman is none other than the only woma , Mrs Sophia Bellalyne Wellington.” The doctor finishes…
“Oh my God!” Sophia closes her hand over her mouth as her migraine goes overboard, her eyes twitching, she kept shaking her head
“No no no.. Bella. Sophia. Lily. Mine. Daughter. . No no no ”
She cried… holding on to Adams as pieces begin to fall into place. Every detail, every tiny event in her life. Her childhood, her life, her uncle, those nights he forced himself on her, her fear, her silence, the trauma. The accident, her parents. . And then lily, in the hospital, her small hands had slipped out of hers as her tiny lips turned blue and the line peeped a straight long line , that loud sound that indicated a life was just lost and her little girl, who used to smile and dance, who loved the smell of flowers as she did, she was gone. Dead. Alone, Buried six feet deep within the ground. White lilies and Red roses covered her grave. Her little girl was gone and all she wanted to do was die. She had ran out, waiting for the truck to run her down and then, nothing, as she hits the ground as she was thrown away to the other side of the road, Adams body supporting her. He had grabbed her just at the nick of time.
“My baby girl. My lily ‘ she cried. They cried together. Adams rocking her back and forth, holding her tight. Sophia holds on to him as though her entire existence depended on it.
“So she is crazy then?” How does this work for her? This ain’t going according to what she had scripted. Today she was happy that she finally broken up their home but now, now, they were bundled up together, crying with each other… What does this mean? Has she lost Adams? No. She can’t. She couldn’t have possibly have.
“So she has to be carried to a mental home then… Put there till she is cured?”
She seemed to be more interested in getting Sophia out of the way.
“She isn’t crazy, so she doesn’t needs to be chained and wearing a stray jacket and kept in a locked room. She needs therapy, constant treatment which ranges from an eclectic mix of psychotherapy techniques, including cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), insight-oriented therapies, dialectical behavioural therapy (DBT), hypnotherapy and eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR). Medications can be used for comorbid disorders and/or targeted symptom relief-
“Again, speak English. ” Rebecca was irritated. The couple hadn’t let go of each other.
“Treatments may take days, weeks, months or years. Constant therapeutic therapy can help to unify personalities. Collapse them into one. The primary and only personality. The behavioural treatments can help to solidify that only if the patient is willing and open to trust and let her therapist have access into her head and inner thoughts and uses a more traditional treatments when a consistent response is established with the single primarily identity which is Sophia, thus closing all doors to her made-up imaginary other self…Bella.
Other therapeutic treatment would be administered, it would be a difficult journey but it can be achieved. Only like I said. . The patient is willing”
The doctor states.
Adams places multiple kisses to her forehead… rocking her back and forth.
“I am sorry. I am so so sorry. I am sorry” he cried.
“I am sorry, I, I didn’t know. I didn’t know any of this. My baby. Our baby, Adams, I am so sorry.” she cried. She had heard everything the doctor as said. She knew it was the truth, it came back to her. Everything, everything did. Even though all of it seemed blurry and painful. Even if her head still hurts and her eyes still kept twitching, she knew the pain in her heart was the truth.
Now it came back to her, slowly in pieces. Vivid images. She remembered her, lily. She remembered waking up at different places, she remembered the hotel, those eyes, Adams. . She remembered and also didn’t. But she knew this was the truth. She was Bella and Bella was her; the other woman was her. Adams never lied to her, her husband never lied to her. She cried.
“Sophia, I need you to give your consent for treatment. You would be taken for treatments. And I promise you everything is going to be okay. I promise. Won’t you give your consent?” She asked her
Sophia held on to Adams who didn’t stop placing kissing to her face, repeating” I love you in your sanity and insanity and I never left you then I would never leave you now” she looks in his eyes, knowing that there was no amount of love more than this and she knew that, with him by her side, she could face every storm and come out okay. Because it didn’t matter how long or how bad, he would be here with her, always. Waiting. Loving, only her. And that’s all she wanted. To have someone who would love her more than himself and to make sacrifices just for her happiness, and because he didn’t want to hurt her or make her relapse into a more helpless state. He had pretended and acted like the lover. Lied to protect her, just to keep her sane… just to make her feel normal.
To say she loved him was an understatement he was her all and she knew with him. .she would come out okay.
“Sophia, do you consent” the doctor asked again
She nods with tears in her eyes, her hands clasped with his, “yes!” I want to be better. Better for him. For lily. For the future. Yes I consent to be treated. ”
She stated. Adams wraps her in a big hug but his tears didn’t stop. Now he didn’t have to lie and hide and pretend. Now he had her back. His wife, His love, His all. And if he had to do it all over again just to see her smile, he would. But he was glad this was over, now, she would get the help she needed and he would be here waiting for her no matter how long it took. He kisses her forehead.
Rebecca looks at the scene with disgust…
“God you just rained on my parade.” she hissed.
“This is messed up” she screamed. Flinging the only thing she could come in contact with… The doctor’s briefcase
They all stare at her.
“I have waited all my life, kept quiet and never said anything about my feelings and bided my time so I can have him, went all the way to pay a private investigator to find him out. Do you know how long I have dreamed to be his woman, do you know how long it took for me to keep my obsession to myself. And you, you Sophia, two times in a roll, you take him away from me. What are you? Some sort of a witch huh?” Rebecca couldn’t hold herself anymore. This was unfair. It was unfair. All her plans gone to waste.
Fxxk it.
“All through college you walked as though you were a queen. Raising your head high like one just out of a castle. Making all the girls want to be like you or be your friend and all the boys drool after you and the only man I ever loved you stole away from me. And after years of waiting. After years of loneliness, after years of being by myself and hating you. Loathing you Sophia. And it’s funny really to realise you are actually crazy.” she laughed. But it wasn’t one of happiness. It was anger filled.
“You , despite your craziness. He still gathers you in his arms, those same arms I had wished to be wrapping me all day and all night one day till forever, he still loves you in your craziness. Even when I stalk him. Want him or force myself on him, even today in his office he kept saying.
“I love my wife and would never cheat on her”
“Oh how foolish of me. How come I didn’t see, Yes Sophia, you are a kind of witch that bewitched him that no matter the fxxk that I do, he wouldn’t ever look my way let alone to touch me… I hate you! I hate you with every fibre in my being, Sophia. Adams is mine, Mine, MINE AND YOU KEEP TAKING HIM FROM ME. THEN AS SOPHIA AND NOW AS FXXKING BELLA!!” she screamed.
“Wow!!” The doctor mutters. Adams and Sophia gets up.
Now it was time for him to deal with Rebecca, now that he got back his wife. He was ready to put Rebecca in her place. Good thing she spilled her guts. At least Sophia can tell she had a snake for a friend all along. He made a step towards her but Sophia stops him with her hands.
She takes a few steps towards Rebecca. .a thin smile on her face.
“I hate you. I hate you Sophia I hope you never get well and you get thrown into an asylum. And don’t worry… Adams might profess love to you now… but trust me when you are locked up in that insanity. I would be here making your husband forget yo-
Wham! !!
Whamp ! ! Whamp!!! Whamp!!!!!
Her face burned, and tears stung her eyes as she held her face. She staggers backward from the force of the slap. She saw stars. She felt a taste of blood in her mouth. Fear grips her.
“Damn” Adams mutters..
“Oh goodness” the doctor exclaims. Sophia had a good hand.
“I would not waste my words on you” her red eyes suddenly became clear. Her tears dried. Her voice strong and clear. As though a few minutes ago she never cried or felt sadness.
“But I would say that you don’t deserve to be called a human being. Much less a friend. I am glad I was able to see the kind of person you are. You are a snake. You are worse than the devil. You have no conscience and I hope to God that I never have to lay my eyes on you and if you ever come close to my man again, Mr W. I would make you regret the day you were born. So you might want to leave now. Disappear. Get lost. Because I won’t be responsible for my action in the next minute and you don’t want to wait around to find out” she hissed as her eyes turned to red slits. She was angry, if she didn’t leave, she didn’t know what she would do but whatever it was, there would be only one of them standing when it’s over
Rebecca felt cold fear seep through her
She had never heard Sophia talk like that before, nor see her more confident before. And the fact that she slapped her a few times and threatening something worse…
“So-Sophia! ” she stutters moving backwards as Sophia stares her down.
“Get out of here now and don’t you dare think of coming near me or my man again.” She stated pointing to the door as she moved closer to her again
Rebecca picks her bag and runs out, stumbling and falling over a chair. She gets up and runs out, crying…
She knew she had lost. And going far away was her best option.
Whoever it was a second ago wasn’t the Sophia she knew… that… That woman scared her. She ran and never looked back.
“Sophia…” Adams calls out, unsure who was standing backing him. She didn’t turn.
“Bella”? He called, Slowly she turns, seeing him she smiles..
“Hey Mr W, you know I love you right?” She says, walking towards him not seeing the woman behind him.
“And I you Bella ” he replies, waiting as she walks into his arms and then she faints.
“Bella? Sophia! Bella! Sophia?” he shook her slightly, she moved, opening her eyes, seeing Adams and the doctor bending over her.
“Sophia?” He called her name…
“It’s me, it’s me baby. It’s me. Am here” she says…
The doctor picks up her briefcase. Her job here is done. She smiles at the couple, this had been a long journey but she was glad it was all over.
It was time for Sophia to take the next step.
*********
A year later, Adams stands outside a facility, waiting.
The door opens and there she stood, beautiful as ever before… Smiling at him.
It’s been over a year since he walked her to the door, tears in her eyes as he kissed her goodbye… telling her he was going to be here waiting for here when her treatment was over. And he didn’t lie.
When he got the call that he could come pick her up. He had been happy, nervous, unsure but happy and he was fidgeting… wondering if she would remember him or if she wouldn’t. But whatever the case. He would never leave.
And when he saw her sweet breath-taking smile. That smile that made his heart stop every time. He knew that everything was okay and he had her back. His Sophia, His wife, His lover and once upon lover Bella… his all. He knew this was his heaven and happiness. ..
He opened his eyes and let the tears drop as she ran into them…
“I love you” she cried into his chest. .
“I love you more… Yesterday, Today and a day more till forever” he breathed into her hair
Three years later….
“Daddy, come back here quick” she says clapping excitedly and jumping up and down.
“Say cheese” Adams says behind the camera as he places it on the TV stand and sets the timer, then runs to join them on the chair
And click…
A picture of Sophia, him and their beautiful daughter. ..” Bella lily Wellington”, whose smile was more breath-taking than the first.
This was their heaven… and love was the strongest bond of all… and thus, they passed all the storms and came out okay.
AUTHORS NOTE
“Whoever says love isn’t the greatest bond of all. Whoever says love can’t break all odds. Whoever says Love can’t move mountains hasn’t ever been loved and let love lift them up higher than their pains and into love-perfect- bliss. Whoever says love isn’t love hasn’t met him… The master of Love. God is Love .And Love knows no sorrows because it’s the greatest gift of all. Let love in… and be loved”
Stephanie Egberike.
Finito.
The End.
