The Coffin Maker Episode 26

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Shortly after Akua Yankey left to the house, a boy between the age of 16 to 18 riding a bicycle mistakenly splashed muddy water on Opana. Michael and Bernice saw the move early, but Opana who was pressing his phone by then didn’t see it so he was badly soaked in the muddy water. The boy wanted to run at first but with his little calculation, he realised that he couldn’t escape freely so he came before Opana to apologise.

Young Boy

(going on his knees)

Sir, please forgive me because I didn’t intentionally splash the water on you. I lost balance due to the speed I was riding so please forgive me.

Opana

You foolish boy, idiot, imbecile, baboon, dimwit, social miscreant, son of a harlot, wizard, devil’s incarnate, on this big road, you couldn’t get anywhere to pass except where I stood and you perfectly executed your plan by splashing muddy water on me. See what you have done to my body and my expensive white kente? Do you know how much it cost me to get this kente? There are only two people apart from me who have the limited edition of this very kente. And they are Otumfuo Osei Tutu II and the president of the republic, Nana Addo Danquah Akufo Addo. I don’t even know if this laundry people can even wash it clean for me to have it the way it was previously? I have seized your bicycle for good and you will never get it.

Young Boy

Sir please forgive me because the bicycle is not mine and if the owner gets to know that I took his bicycle, he will kill me because he just bought it yesterday, and I didn’t deliberately splash the muddy water on you. Please I beg of you as today is a Sunday morning.

Opana

Do I look like God who forgives people their sins? We were three people standing here, so why am I the only person who got soaked with the muddy water if what you did was not on purpose? You better leave my sight before I seize the dress you are wearing together with the bicycle.

Young Boy

Sir, please I beg you, if you take this bicycle away I don’t know what will happen to me when I get home? I am on my knees begging you.

Opana

Well, if the owner decides to kill you, I sell coffin so your people will come and buy from me and I will get more money.

Michael Ansah

Papa please forgive him and take it that it is me or any of your children that mistakenly splashed muddy water on you. He looks helpless and I believe he didn’t splash the water on you on purpose, Papa God will bless you more if you forgive him for his wrong against you.

Opana

Chancellor of the Exchequer, father know-all, Pope Michael of Ghana, Renowned Psychologist, Perfect Mediator, was I not standing here with you before this fool splashed muddy water on me?. Did you even get a small stain in your dress? Don’t bring yourself for me to channel some of my anger on you. Do you know how I suffered before I got this kente? Osei Kwame Despite was the one who wanted to buy this particular kente but I outsmarted him and this fool has managed to stain it. (pushes the bicycle home whiles the others followed him closely pleading with him)

Akua Yankey

Ah, what happened to you, my dear? Where from this muddy stains in your kente and face?

Young Boy

Madam, I mistakenly splashed water on him when I lost balance as I was riding. Please help me beg him because it wasn’t deliberate, he has seized the bicycle which does not belong to me. The owner will kill me if I don’t return home with the bicycle.

Akua Yankey

My love, please forgive him. You know he is a young boy just like our daughter, please take it that it’s one of our children who mistakenly splashed water on you and forgive him.

Michael Ansah

That is exactly what I said to Papa earlier on but he rather insulted me.

Opana

Will you shut that stupid gutter you call a mouth up before I tie it with my bare hands. Didn’t you see what went on Kwaku Mike? And for you woman, I blame you for everything that happened.

Akua Yankey

You blame me for what reason my dear?

Opana

You decided to ruin my day, right from dawn you started making noise to interrupt my sleep. As if that was not enough, you forced me to put this expensive kente on even though we are attending a common thanksgiving service. Upon leaving the house too you asked me to wait for you at the spot this fool came to spoil everything. And you are there pleading for mercy on his behalf. Let me tell you this, even if Mary decides not to go to Bethlehem with Joseph and she comes here heavily pregnant, I won’t listen to her plea. If she likes she can decide not to give birth to Jesus Christ on the 25th of December.

Akua Yankey

My love please, when sometimes we talk kindly listen to us.

Bernice Ansah

Papa, please forgive him for it wasn’t deliberate for him to splash the water on you.

From nowhere Eno Bruwaa surfaced and she also joined the pleading party.

Eno Bruwaa

I know this matter doesn’t concern me but I am only stepping in because am also a mother who feels for children. Please my landlord kindly forgive the boy. I saw what happened and I know the boy didn’t deliberately splash the water on you, it was a mere accident so please temper justice with mercy.

Opana

Woman, hold your peace, as you rightly said, this matter doesn’t concern you so please go find something to do with yourself before I give you a piece of my anger cake.

Akua Yankey

(raging with anger seeing Eno Bruwaa)

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And who invited you into this madam? All you know is to go about poking your nose into things that don’t concern you and gossip around. You think I have forgiven you for the ugly things you said about my son when he had a brawl with Agnes? I haven’t gotten your time yet and at the right time, I will deal with you.

Opana

My dear what did she say about my son?

Akua Yankey

My love can you imagine this heartless woman was gossiping with Hajia Kubra that she wishes Agnes was her blood relation, she would have personally taken the case to the high court and would have done anything in her power to jail my son?

Eno Bruwaa

Aunty Akua, please you heard me wrongly with what I was telling Hajia Kubra. I was only explaining something to her but you got to hear only the negative things I was saying. Please don’t misjudge me because I know the good things your family has been doing for mine.

Michael Ansah

So, all this while you wanted my downfall, Eno? What wrong did I ever do to you in this compound? Don’t I help your grandchildren with their homework and even teach them sometimes when am free in the house at night? Indeed, some people act like lovers but behind your back, they are your real enemies.

Eno Bruwaa

It seems you have all gotten the wrong signal so I will take leave now to let sleeping dogs lie.

Opana

Mmmm madam you see your life? By their fruits, they shall be known. I won’t say much, but you will hear from me soon and you will love my statement due to the nature and power of it. No one invited you here, so take your embarrassed self and leave this place you gossip. Now you young boy just leave this place before I do something drastic to you and let me sound an aggressive warning to everyone here that anyone who touches this bicycle or gives it out to anyone, I will personally skin the person alive. Go to church because am not joining you any longer.

Akua Yankey

My love, please don’t bring that now because you promised to go to church with us some days ago and just reflect on the things that have happened to this family and how good the Lord has been to us. Please don’t let the devil walk in to spoil our plans for the day.

Opana

You take the lead for me to join you later. I have to wash down again and find a new dress since you have to meet the session clerk early so you give him your message for an announcement.

Bernice Ansah

Papa please are you sure you will come to church truly?

Opana

Certainly, my daughter, you know your father here doesn’t go against his words and any promise he makes, he fulfils it.

Akua Yankey

If you say so we will meet at church but please don’t be late. Mike stop a taxi so we rush to church because we are behind time already.

Opana goes inside the house with the bicycle and locks it in one of the storerooms so that no one will get access to it. All this while, Agnes Kyerewaa was standing at a reasonable distance watching the action that took place previously.

Agnes Kyerewaa

So this boy has been released erh? No wonder my uncle refused me the opportunity to see him when I came back from the hospital yesterday. He can’t be walking about freely after what he did to me. I will deal with him squarely but first let me call my uncle so he tells me the reason why that bastard is still walking about freely on the street.

On Phone:

Commander

Hello my beautiful niece how are you doing this morning?

Agnes Kyerewaa

Uncle, you don’t expect me to be happy when that monster is still walking about freely on the street like nothing happened.

Commander

My dear, I would advise you to forget about him and what happened because that guy has got connections that anywhere you take him, with a single call he will be set free so I urge you to just forget about what happened between the two of you. A call that came from above was enough to let me lose my job if I kept him in my custody for even a minute further. My dear any money you spent at the hospital, am ready to incur the expenditure, so bring to my office tomorrow all the receipts of the monies you have spent so far.

Agnes Kyerewaa

Am not happy with your explanations ooo uncle because am sensing something fishy in here ooo.

Commander

My dear shut up and listen to me. How much can those people pay me so I betray my niece?. Just come to the office tomorrow, take good care of yourself and take your drugs judiciously. (call ends)

Opana, on the other hand, is contemplating if he should go to church or not but in the end, he came to the conclusion that he will join his family at church. He got himself a new dress and left the house but on his way, he met a long time friend and they diverted to a drinking spot to break some bottles. After consuming three bottles of beer he decided to go to church. But something funny but serious happened in the church.

Do you want to guess what funny thing happened in the church?