I looked at her, Fast asleep. I smiled at the thought of her dancing up and down in the night club , I had taken her out for dinner and later on to some club. I heard Mark 2 was performing that night.
I had practically forced her to dance whilst I watched. I knew nothing concerning dancing so I stayed back and watched , her colour and looks won her some glances and I felt proud to be the only one she paid attention to.
Shrugging I walked to the bathroom to make a call. I couldn’t let Paula hear my conversation.
“Hey everything alright ?” I asked the guy I left watching Jay and Serah ..
“Everything is okey man , they have done as you requested after some few minutes of punishing them.”
I sighed and relaxed as I sat on top of the toilet cover. “Good that’s good , now keep that information safe will come get it tomorrow” I told him before hanging up.
“Whoops !” I whispered standing up, stood in front of the mirrow and watched myself for a while.
Replaying the time after I took Jay and Serah from the hotel.
I had gone outside with him after he dressed up. He booked out as l waited for him , at some point he almost wanted to alert the security guard but I acted fast holding and squeezing his palm so hard he winced with pain. He later on packed his bags and my guy carried them to the vehicle outside. Jay , Serah and myself walked out later on and I made sure they acted normal , threatening to shoot them in case of any silly act.
“What do you want from us?” Jay had asked as I tied his hands in the back seat.
“Mmmmmh , will see my dear , all in due time” I had responded with a smile. Serah was quite and looked really scared . I had earlier given her the greatest scare of her life when I told her a story of how I and the other guys operated Under general Loko’s command in the jungle in Congo . I told them a story as we were still inside the hotel.
“You know what ?” I had started , “am a changed person and I swear to God Paula is a big part of this change. I don’t know why you two have insisted on separating us. You Sarah you have been friends with her for a long time but you are too much bitter with your own life such that you can’t stand seeing her achieve and have what she has.
And you,” I said, pointing at Jay , “you can have any woman you want including this Serah here. I am just wondering why you have sworn to separate me and Paula and I can assure you at the end of this day. You both will tell me your true intentions ” I added seriously…
“Now let me tell you the kind of person you two messed with in case the stories you have heard about me left some major details.
I was forced to do the most inhuman things under the command of that ruthless Loko. He started by making us go through the harshest purnishment there was , he tortured us for two months , making sure we came to the point of barking to his orders like dogs. He made sure our sense of human and goodness was shut. What he planted in us was the mind of wild dogs , who would simply comply and do as told.
One day after what he called our initiation was almost over. You know what he did ?” I paused , looking at Jay and Serah who listened though pretended to not care..
“Oh well ,will tell you anyway.
That man took us to a certain village , he wanted us to slaughter the whole Palace murdering the family of the chief just because he stood to oppose whoever was sending our commander Loko.
He made us pull out the entire palace outside pulling everyone out as the women and children wailed creating some noise in the dark quite nights of that time.
I was personally pointed at to go first cutting off the head of the first Princes of the kingdom , a beautiful looking woman. I had to do it, if I refused to do as told, the entire crew of Zambian soldiers would die.
You see, I was so scared, the look on that girls face haunts me up to date. I chose the lives of my friends and myself over that innocent girl’s. I felt the deepest pain I had ever felt before ,it was the first time I was subjected to kill someone.
Everything else I was trained to do was to serve the lives of people but that lunatic made me go against the principle I was taught of defending and protecting lives. I stood there like a stone the head of that girl in my hands and cried like a baby.
I could hear the mother curse and spat insults at me , but my ears had become deaf. All I could hear was the last heart beat of the woman laying on my foot.
From that day I decided to stop feeling. I turned off my humanity because that was the only way I was to survive whatever followed. The killing, the beating and burning of innocent people. I thought God really had neglected all of us , the people we were forced to kill and our poor souls.
I was dead inside and that was the lesson Loko taught me , to shut down my human nature so that I don’t feel any pain or sorrow, Until one day I started planning on escaping gaining courage to try and survive , call it luck or blessing . I managed to find myself free from that cruel life and for sure heaven’s made me find Paula..
I fall for her but it took me a long time for me to make a move , know why?” I asked , pausing as I saw Serah Now shivering with fear of what I was telling them. Jay’s head was turned down to the floor.
Because I feared myself. I didn’t trust I was capable of loving someone that special , that pure. My instincts were to protect her at all cost and that I did to cover up the love l felt for her. She made my life sane and easy. She shined some light into my dark past and my heart started beating again.
Now , tell me if you were in my shoes and someone tries to mess with you after everything. Won’t you do the worst to that someone ?” I asked with a grinn .
“Let me make this clear , everything that hurts me forces me to turn off my human self that’s the way I learnt to shield myself from pain , that should tell you that right now am pissed with both of you and l was truly hurt with what you two did. So as it is , am capable of anything and I have no remorse whatsover. Now, coming to the present , do as I tell you and you will live to see your country again” I warned standing up..
“I will not let you take away the only thing that keeps me alive and sane” I added opening the door to let them walk after me. Without hesitation they both stood looking at my now stern gaze giving them the impression I was not playing around.
Later that day I took them to some cabin in a shanty compound maiteneke area. I saw Serah’ s face turn pale and Jay looked older than his age as I indicated them to go inside the one room cabin.
Sighing I pulled a stool and sat facing them both as they sat on the small bed in the corner.
“Your issue is simple from now on” I told them ,
“you two are going to narrate your stories about how you planned on destroying Paula’s life. You Jay cannot give that fake story that you love her , that’s not true and you snake hearted girl , will tell why you hate Paula so much to the extent you want to see her suffer and probably get to enjoy what she has. So now guys ” I smiled slightly ,
” this gentle man here will first show you how serious this is especially if you don’t corporate and he will record your confessions.”
I stood to go and paused by the door .
“Oh, before I forget ,say the truth only. If you lie.. Mmmmmh” I frowned putting my hands in my pockets.
” I bet you will leave me no choice but to make you part of the people l have helped see their master earlier than they wanted to” I added looking at both their faces and grinning before leaving .
“Give them both some discipline and be careful not to hurt them beyond expectation , all I want is for them to understand am dead serious and I will have those confessions tomorrow before putting them on their flight back to their country” l told him as I opened the door to the car. “Prepare the recording now” I added reversing to head out to the main road
I called a few friends and for someone to organise for me two plane tickets to Australia via South Africa.
I had no regret I was going to spend money. All I wanted was to close Serah and Jay’s chapters from our lives. From what I noticed , their interest was not so they win Paula’s heart back to Jay. I had started understanding they both were skimming for something bigger , probably wealth
I was almost driving in the yard that evening when Paula’ s father called me to let me know he was nomited as the person to stand on the position of MP for Solwezi constituency. I honestly congratulated him.
“Don’t tell Paula yet son, I will come tell her myself later. I called you because the opposition has it’s own plots arising against my campaign coming soon.I want you to help organise for me tight security know what I mean ?” He had asked.
“Yeah I understand , don’t worry consider it down sir.”
” By the way how did it go with your mission to Lusaka ?” He asked.
“Someone else went in my place Sir. I had some things to sort out but will join the crew in a few days. ” I answered rubbing my forehead.
Mr Benson was more involved politically than l ever thought , he was one of the main money funding person to the rulling party and had a strong relationship with the President. He knew of my reinstatement at the force and most of the target missions we were to carry out .
I looked at the door to the apartment and saw Paula run to me and she suspected something was up with me. I had a lot on my mind but I had to stay calm.
The new Job I was to go do in Lusaka was not only dangerous but also life threatening , the people sent ahead were sent to prepare the way for the main job we were to pull out.
I shook my head as I saw my eyes look sad and tired in the mirrow in front of me. I had been standing there lost in thoughts for almost an hour.
I swore to myself that trip would be the last. I decided to fight for a resignation. I had a family to look after now and at 34 I bet I had seen a lot of things and had been through enough tough conditions.
“Am going to let go of my past and old military life to enjoy my life with the woman who is in my hands” l said to myself holding her as she shook a bit grabbing my hands and rapping them around her body.
I smiled and closed my eyes feeling her heart beat from her back as sleep clouded my head.
To be continued