As I tell you Sarah our small house-maid don spoil, just imagine the girl was pestering me about my brother that she loves him. I come dey wonder na picture she love or person wey dey overseas, I told her that she is too small to talk about marriage and love. And the girl claimed she isn’t a small pikin, aunty wetin you be na? because you small for my eyes or you be small mama.
She even claimed that she will do my brother well whenever they want to do mommy and daddy, that small girl is something else. I wonder who told her all these kind of stuffs, she told me that she always peep whenever her parents did it in the night. How manage? one room came her reply.
Back to the matt when Clara tried to test my height over her shortness, after Corper Puna was disgraced by me. I didn’t know how Clara figured it out that I was the one ’cause no one was suspecting me of the crime, she rushed from only God knows and met me having a cool time under a mango tree with my break-time snacks I bought.
Clara: witch, shebi you don succeed?
Me: na me you dey call witch, calanja?
Clara: na me you dey call dwarf, Gift?
Me: I no get strength for you, commot here.
Clara: na you do that thing to Corper Tony?
Me: na you send Corper Puna?
Clara: *pointing a finger at me* I go deal with you for this school.
Me: you nodey fear, you dey point somebody wey tall pass you. You want my fall on top of you? She landed a slap on my face and I returned the favour with two back and front slap in a quick succession, I pushed her forcefully on the head and she stumbled back staggering to the ground, she came at me again and I pressed my height on a short stature and I made sure she is shorter than before, we were separated and taken to the staff-room, they flogged both of us but her own is way worse because she be former SP.
Brown started disturbing me and preaching love, I no want another wahala from any boyfriend but he refused to give up. The thing funny how he will woo till we get to our gate, sending love letters to me.
Me: I don tell you no many times you nodey tire?
Brown: I nofit tire, I love you.
Me: audio love bah?
Brown: no, I truly love you.
Me: I accept.
Since we started dating na only hug we don hug, Brown will be vibrating like nokia torch anytime we hug I come dey wonder why. And the wahala be say na me godey start those hugs, so tiring.
Which kind boyfriend I go give myself, the most annoying thing was when he visited me and we spent the whole day without kiss or even body contact, if you want to be celibate don’t admit somebody daughter into your celibacy before faceless thunder will strike you death.
I was so angry with him that I refused talking to him, as a sweet-talker he is, I couldn’t hold my silence for so long and I told what was on my mind. He was surprise and he told me he is a saint, person wey never shift pant before. I doubted sha…
One day he visited my house, I took him to my bedroom and I started another kiss section, he was new to it and the moment we broke the kiss he was panting like someone who has ran two metres bare-foot. Ahh.. Ahh! He was so excited to try it again, before I even removed my bra cup, he has cu-mmed in his boxer, all effort to make his kulikuli rise yield no result.
True true the guy was a virgin, where on Earth did this one crawl out from ehnn? abeg I don return to ona ohh… I told him he can only be my friend and he was excited to be one if I will always allow him to kiss me, I agreed and he was so happy like mad. He even bought me a gift for agreeing, what does this one have with kiss?
After I wrote my Jamb and scored high, then came WAEC with enough Exam bombs I made all my papers. I wrote POST-UTME and past, University here I come.
Our Elder say when a child stepped into a water without knowing how to swim, he/she will end up drowning