Hazel’s p.o.v
I wonder if there was anything there in the first place but since I was still under the effect of his touch, I couldn’t bring myself to accuse him of anything but instead decided to get back to shaving his chin to avoid his scrutinizing eyes.
Shaving for someone after such a long time was beginning to bring back the memories of the time I did the same for Andrew and the more I try dismissing them, more and more memories took over and not until I felt something warm gliding down my cheeks did I know I was beginning to cry.
I wasn’t supposed to cry.
Conscious of the streak of tear on my cheeks, I quickly tried wiping it off to prevent him from noticing and that was when he found out I was crying.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” He asked with concern.
“Nothing.” I mumbled, wiping away another stray tear just for it to be followed by more gliding down my cheeks.
“Oh no, I’m so sorry.” I shut my eyes, desperate to stop the tears.
I was so embarrassed to have him seeing me that way.
“I didn’t mean to…”
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He rose from the stool he was sitting on and pulled me into a comforting hug, taking me completely off guard.
My mind went blank for a while and I stiffened for the second time that evening, at his gesture but after some time, I let my body relax in his embrace.
I was only sniffling now, having succeeded in trying to hold back the tears. I wanted to remain strong. I didn’t want to cry, just like I hadn’t since the day he died.
“Hey,” Madrigal called.
“Hmm?”
“You know, it’s okay to let it all out whenever you are hurt about something. You can cry all you want. Cry all you want, I will be here.” He said softly.
A tear slid down my cheek at his words and this was immediately followed by another.
I started sobbing softly.
Allowing my emotions to take over, I started crying out loud. I allowed the held back tears from two years to stream out without restraint.
He told me I could let it all out.
I wanted to let it all out.
“You are not responsible for this illness, and when I die, you must not cry. You did a lot of that already because of me. Be strong for me okay? I want you to be happy always, that way I will be happy wherever I am. Promise me that hazel- Promise me you will always be happy.” Those were andrew’s words before he breathed his last.
I wanted to keep the promise I made to him and even though I miss him so much and every single day after he died seemed like he died a day before, I couldn’t cry.
It was only until I had gotten all the tears out I found out I had my arms tightly wrapped round him than I was supposed to. Instantly, I quickly released my arms.
TBC
