Balcony Boy Episode 24


“Oh, Amber, we invited Jake to Palma with us today.”

I look up from my toast. “Why?”

“You never make a friend on holiday, this is a rare occurrence. I still can’t believe it, personally.”

“Thanks, Dad.” I say, rolling my eyes.

He smiles at me, “You’re very welcome.”

As soon as I step out of the car at Palma, I look to the marina. I’m greeted by rows upon rows of luxury yachts.

“Bloom, that yacht has a helicopter on it. A f—–g helicopter.”

I look to where he’s pointing and my eyes widen in shock, “I want to be rich.”

“Join the queue.” Jake laughs from beside me. “So, what’s first?”

“I’ve always wanted to tour the Cathedral, so we could start there? There’s usually market stalls near it as well so we can look at those.”

Jake nods and grabs my hand, “Lead the way.”

We walk in the direction of the Cathedral, its spire visible over the other buildings that surround us. We walk beside the fountains and I get Jake to take my picture. He also asks someone else to take a picture of both of us with the cathedral in the background and sighs in relief when the person doesn’t run off with his phone.

After queuing in the sun and paying €7, we finally get into the cathedral. It was completely worth it.

“Oh my God.” Jake says receiving a glare from a woman standing close by and I giggle slightly. “What? Why did that lady try to set me on fire with her eyes?”

“You’re not religious, are you?”


“The 3rd commandment, ‘Thou shalt not take God’s name in vain’.”

“So…what does that mean.”

“Some people interpret it as you’re not supposed to say ‘God’ unless it’s in prayer.”

“But other people don’t?” He asks.

“Some people aren’t so literal, they see it as you just aren’t supposed to use God’s name if you’re blaming him for something, or just using it negatively in general.”

He nods slowly, “Got it. So, I’m guessing you’re religious?”

I nod, smiling. “But that’s not the only reason I like Cathedrals.” I shrug, “I just appreciate good architecture.”

We walk around the cathedral marvelling at everything, and just before we leave I place €2 in the donation box and light a candle.

When we exit, I squint as the sun hits my eyes and we walk down the steps towards the market. We stroll through, hand in hand, until Jake spots a caricaturist and insists on having his picture drawn. I stood behind the artist whilst Jake sits on a little stool in front of me. I giggle as the guy draws Jake a massive head.

“What you laughing at?” Jake asks with a goofy smile.


He narrows his eyes at me and I just smile back innocently. The man stops and turns to me. “You in with him?” He says with slightly broken English. I look towards Jake for an answer.

“Yes! Amber be in it with me.”

“Where will I sit?”

The man begins to get a stool from beside him but Jake waves him off. “You can sit on my knee.”

I begin to shake my head but Jake had already stood to drag me over. He pulls me on his lap and I wrap my arms around his shoulders.

“So Amber, tell me, what do you want for Christmas?”

“You haven’t got the facial hair to be Father Christmas.”

“Are you teasing my inability to grow facial hair?” He strokes his chin in mock offence.


He just shakes his head and looks back to the man currently drawing us, a bright smile gracing his features.

Caricature in hand, Jake drags me down a street filled with shops and begins to head towards Louis Vuitton.

“Jake, what are you doing?”

“Doing some shopping.” He says with a shrug of his shoulders, his back towards me as he strolls casually to the designer store.

“There is no way you brought enough money with you to buy anything in that shop.”

“Who says I’m buying anything?” He says, turning to throw me a wink over his shoulder.

As we near the shop, a man in a suit opens the door for us and as soon as I step inside, I instantly fell out of place.

Almost as if it was written across their foreheads, I could sense that everyone else in this shop had just gotten off of their yachts. Everything was branded, head to toe, the men in their white collared shirts, the women in their navy and white striped shirts and white shorts.

I inch closer to Jake. “We don’t belong.” I whisper.

He places an arm around my shoulder, “We belong anywhere we want to.”

He walks further into the shop, picking up pairs of shoes and trying on sunglasses, as I stand by and watch, too scared to even breathe on anything. A worker in a suit walks up to us, eyeing us up and down, clearly doubting our ability to afford anything in here and to be fair, he’s completely right.

“Can I help you sir?”

“Can I try a pair of these in a size 10?” Jake asks.

The man raises an eyebrow but nevertheless says, “Of course, sir. I’ll be right back.”

I hit Jake on the arm as he watches the man with a smug expression on his face. “What are you doing?” I hiss.

“Trying on a pair of shoes.” He replies with a nonchalant shrug.

“A what? £300 pair of shoes?”

“More like £560, but whatever.”

I hit him again but he just laughs, turning from me just in time to face the man as he returns, shoe box in hand. Jake takes the box from him with a thank you and sits on a nearby stool to try them on. One he has both trainers on, he stands and walks in a small circle.

“Hey Amber, can you take a picture of me in them?” He asks, handing me his phone. “Just need to make sure they look good on camera, mate.” He says to the man.

I reluctantly step back and takes the picture, handing Jake back the phone when I’m done.

“Now you see, they just don’t look right.” He places his phone back in his pocket and takes the shoes off and putting them back in the box, handing it to the man. “Thanks for your help though.” He says before grabbing my hand and leaving the shop.

I just shake my head. “You are ridiculous.”