The Prognosticator Episode 16


***** DISASTER ****** .

“Christabel said i should removed anything removable” “what should i removed now?” “I can’t removed her clothes” “We are outside not in the bedroom” “This girl must be high on women ritual cream i rubbed, for her to say i should removed anything removable” “Something is amiss” .

Christabel: ***she placed her right hand on my shoulder and caress my chest with left hand*** Pesman i said you should remove anything removable .

Me: What else do you want me to remove? .

Christabel: Pesman i’m all yours you can remove whatever you find attractive on me .

Me: Including your trouser and shirt? .

Christabel: If that’s what you want to remove please go ahead .

Me: Don’t you know we are outside? .

Christabel: I don’t care, all i care about is you, not people looking at us .

Me: ** At this junction i have to act fast, I turned to M.c and i brought out another 1000naira note** M.c i will pay fine .

M.c: **Collected the money from me** Finally Finally you run away, my brother you no get mind o, i trust myself… Anyway A very big thanks to you guyz, you really impressed me you can now go back to your seat, please give them around of applause “Kpa” “Kpa” “Kpa” The crowd clapped for us, we walked back to our seat .

Christabel: Pesman be looking at my bag for me, i want to go and pee outside .

Me: Don’t stay too long ** She left, immediately she left one beautiful dark girl walked to me, she put on blue vest, “July 27th is all about Grace Happy birthday” was inscribed at the front of the vest. She sat beside me (Christabel chair) The girl was looking beautiful that i felt like kissing her that moment, The scent of the perfume she wore smelt like that of “Smart perfume” she was truly angel on earth, the smile on her face is killing, before I knew it my d–k was semi-hard, i must confess “BLACK IS BEAUTIFUL

” Hi she said to me .

Me: **Stammer** HHHH IIII .

Girl: Please can i make use of your phone? .

Me: Yes you can ** I brought out my phone unlocked it gave it to her** .

Girl: **She pounced some digits on it and placed it on her ear but she doesn’t say anything, she gave it back to me and said thank you** .

Me: Have you used it finished? .

Girl: Yes i have .

Me: Seems the number you called isn’t connect? .

Girl: It does .

Me: But i can’t hear you say anything .

Girl: Don’t bother your self, i saved my number on your phone with “JAMEELAH” .

Me: What is the meaning of “JAMEELAH?” .

Girl: It is an hausa name .

Me: So you are an hausa girl? .

Girl: Yes from Zaria .

Me: Woow that’s good i love Zaria .

Jemeelah: Kanajih hausa na? ( Do you hear hausa?) .

Me: Kahdan’n (Little) .

Jameelah: Toh (ok) .

Me: Maiyasa kika sa numba ki akan waya na? (why do you saved your number on my phone?) .

Jameelah: Zankira ki gobe (i will call you tomorrow) .

Me: Kenada namba na? (Do you have my number?) .

Jameelah: Ainada namba, Nayi amfani da wayanki sai na kira nawa, Bari imbarnan domin mastoyan katana man (Yes i do, i used your phone to called mine, get to go now your bae is here)

** she walked away**

Christabel walked to me side on her seat, she faced me and said .

Christabel: Who is that girl i saw you with? .

Me: M.c asked her to come and ask for my name (i lied) .

Christabel: And you were talking like that? .

Me: I don’t want to answer her because i don’t know her until M.c signal me (i lied further) .

Christabel: Hmmmm .

Me: Believe me Christabel .

Christabel: I do .

Me: Thanks dear love you

** Omo this fayemi charm na confirm oo, she as girls dey run after me** .

Christabel: Don’t forget you are sleeping in my house .

Me: I won’t, i don’t promise and fail .

Christabel: That’s wonderful you, love you .

Me: Love you more

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M.c: Make una laugh small, let me tell you one funny story of Aminat .


On that fateful day, Amina was on her way to school when a motor cycle knocked her down! She was rushed to a nearby hospital immediately. That night in her dream, an old woman in white garment appeared to her and warned her sternly that:

“As soon as you are discharged from the hospital, you must wash the blood stains from that cloth you wore that day you were involved in an accident otherwise something terrible may happen to YOU!”

Amina thought it was just an ordinary dream not until she saw the same old woman in her dream again&again&again…. telling her to wash the blood stains from the cloth. This time, Amina was frightened and told her mother the dream. Her mother simply told her to do exactly as she was told. The moment Amina got home from the hospital, that very day she was discharged, She soaked the cloth and started washing. She washed and washed but there was still small stain of blood on the cloth because the blood stains had dried already. .

She got tired and rinsed the cloth like that. It was a white gown. That night in her dream, the same old woman appeared to her again and told her to wash the cloth very well that there was still blood stains on it which may cause something terrible to happen to her.

When Amina woke up, she checked the time, it was 4:00am…everywhere was still dark. She was consumed with fear! . and because she was afraid of the old woman’s caution, she got up, took the cloth and started washing. She scrubbed it so hard that it felt like it was going to tear. Amina was scrubbing the cloth so hard that tears almost started dropping from her eyes when all of a sudden, someone tapped her from behind. She turned and behold, the old woman in her dream had appeared to her in real life….

Out of fear, Amina got up to run but fell down. The old woman drew closer to Amina and said softly, .

“Henceforth! Use SUNLIGHT detergent to do your washings.”

Lols. Sorry. . b4 u insult me I’m still looking 4 the guy who sent this to me so that I can break his head. .

**Every body laugh beyond imaginations, As M.c continued with his hilarious jokes, we were served with plate of rice and egg with coca-cola drink, The beers ran here and there with the tray we began to catch fun when something horrible happened** .

M.c: Next on the programme list is cutting of the cake, the celebrate should come forward with this list 1. Her parents (If on the sit) 2. Her boyfriends (If there is any) 3. Her best friends (With their Niggas) 4. Her neighbours 5. Her crushers 6. Her worst enemies (If present) .

Abbey moved to the front hugged Grace so tight, Grace signal to Christabel and i to also come forward, her other friends also came forward with their various boyfriends, some of her relatives and neighbours also joined us, we were about 25 on the stage ready for cutting of the beautiful cake. .

M.c: You are all welcome, but before we gat this cake cut, there is one riddle for you guys, Anybody that get it will go home with 25yen (Japanese currency). Here is the riddle what is the English Translation of “ATA SA PA MI LORI?”. . We all dumped for some minutes before the most brilliant among us started with heavily Grammar such as “Pepper had entered my head” “pepper enters my head” “Pepper don enter my head” “Pepper has entered my head” “Pepper had circulated in to my head” Till the moment i’m writing this story i haven’t figured out the correct answer to that question, but i believed you guys would answer it in the comment box .

M:c: I don laugh tired oo, you guys try sha, but even me i don’t know the answer oo, kindly take it home as an assignment, now let get the cake cut. Grace lighted the candles, All of us clapped. She then blew out the candles and cut the cake after m.c Spelled her name G-R-A-C-E. We all sang in a chorus “Happy birthday to you” “Happy birthday to you” “Happy birthday to you Darling” “Happy birthday to you” “How old are you now” “How old are you now” “How old are you now Darling” “How old are you now” “Happy birthday Darling, many happy returns”.

But before we could finished our song i heard “Gbosi” “Gbosi” “Gbosi” But i didn’t felt any pain, i rubbed my right hand on my head there is no sign of wound, what is happening to me? Dupe words are about to pass again but i couldn’t feel any pain maybe i would felt it later, i was lost in thought when Abbey fainted by my side, he was soak with blood, i now faced the reality the sound of bottles i heard was smashed on Abbey. I quickly bent down to carry my friend, Abbey! Abbey!! Abbey!!! I called out his name but no replied. Grace and christabel were crying profusely, i raised up my head to see only Grace and christabel with me, everyone has ran away. That was the end of the party .

Grace; **Crying** what do we do now? Please don’t leave me alone .

Christabel: Don’t worry dear. We will stand by you, pesman what do we do now? .

Me: **Dupe prophecies later come to pass sha, she said early that something bad will happened, but thank God it wasn’t to me but Abbey** I think we should carry him to hospital .

Grace: Where do we get car by this time of the night ? .

Me: We will see car outside, this is past 10pm .

Grace: I pray so .

Christabel: You guys should stop wasting time with this talking let save him on time .

Me: Oya let carry him **We carried him outside the gate, Thank God we found cab on time and conveyed us to the nearest hospital**



Time was 11:12pm

Abbey woke after he was stabilized and injected by the nurse, Thank God he made it. .

Christabel: **whisper into my ear** pesman i think its time for us to go to my house .

Me; I think we would sleep here in the hospital? .

Christabel: No, i want to feel you in me .

Me: Let stay with your friend and mine (Grace and Abbey) .

Christabel: **Faced grace** Baby we have to go now, we would check on you tomorrow

**She drag me out without hearing response from grace, she don’t even allowed me to say hi to Abbey** .

Me: But why the hurry? (I said to her in outside) .

Christabel: It wasn’t my fault, i love you pesman, wanna feel you .

Me: I know but we shouldn’t rush .

Christabel: I didn’t rush the time is due already .

Me: Where do we see cab this night .

Christabel: If we couldn’t see a cab again this night, we will trek .

Me: Trek? .

Christabel: Yes! My house isn’t that far from here .

Me: aren’t you afraid of darkness? .

Christabel: With you beside me, nothing bad shall happen to me .

Me: Hmmmm .

Christabel: Pesman you are a man, try to act like one, lets go .

Me: God i dey your hand o, protect me against all the evil doer on the road ** We started the journey by treking, we walked like 10min and continued chatting like happy couples before we heard

** “TWO OF YOU SHOULD STOP THERE” It was vigilante people “OLODE MU YIN” (you are under arrest) .

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To be continued