We quickly took our bath. Collect our card we kept under our old television and ran out.
Me: Samuel oboy.. This #3,000 wey we play now na #800,000 we go receive be that oo..
Samuel: you don see am.
Me: so how mu go take share am.
Mama iyabo: una good afternoon.
She greeted as we were passing her shop.
Me & Samuel: Good afternoon oo, how iyabo our wife na!
Mama iyabo: she dey fine. Where una dress they hurry go like this na?
Me: ahhhhhhhhhh na baba ijebu wey we wi…..
Samuel quickly pinched me.
Samuel: we won see the winning numbers. At least if any of our paddy win, then small cake go dey for us be that.
Mama iyabo: no problem. Make una go come back you hear?
Me & Samuel: yes ma
we walked out of her shop
Samuel: you dey mad?
Me: wetin i do?
Samuel: na everybody you won tell say we win baba ijebu?
Me: no na she be..
Samuel: shut up, you no see how those boys wey dey take igbo dey look us.
Me: iyeee, my money ooo.
Samuel: you just get luck say i follow you…
Me: thank God oo..
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ALHAJI’S FAROUK PRODUCTION LTD
Stephanie: *picked her telephone* yes come into my office now.
Her PA Moses came inside.
Stephanie: what is the meaning of this *showing him some script*
Moses: i don’t understand you ma.
Stephanie: are you mad. I asked what is the meaning of these jargons you edited and you are telling me you don’t understand me..
Moses: *looked at the script* oh ma i am sorry. I was editing it late in the night that was why i made only ONE mistake.
He said emphasizing on the one.
Stephanie: shut up you fool. Good for nothing b—–d..
Moses: *angry, he couldn’t take it anymore* you shut up you spoilt brat. You are nothing but an over confident fool. A spoilt nanny she-goat. You think because you are rich means that you own the whole word. Hahaha, you just so hibafous because when death finally comes, he won’t know if you are rich or poor, he is just going to take away your miserable life. Also can your money buy you a place in heaven??
Stephanie: *now red like a heated iron* did you just called me names, did you?
She said and to Moses surprised, she flew over her table and landed him a hot slap. She was about to slap him again when he caught her hand.
Moses: *holding her hand in mid-air* you better thank your stars that you are in your office if not i would have beaten you blue-black- purple.
He said and pushed Her roughly, she staggered and hit her table. Then he angrily walked away, went to his table, parked his important document and left the company. He is not ever going to come back again.
Stephanie: *now very angry, picked her telephone* yes, i need a new PA!!!!!!
She shouted and dropped the receiver. D–n, he was lucky there was no bottles, or anything strong around there. She thought.
BABA IJEBU OFFICE
we were waiting for our turn to reach when i took my phone to browse the internet just to while away time.
Samuel: wetin again?
Me: another goodnews.
Samuel: for where?
Me: you remember stephanie?
Samuel: yes, the girl wey una village witch use do mumu for your head. Wetin happen to her?
Me: she don fire her PA and she needs another one.
I said after sending my cv and other important document through Gmail to one of my friend working there. He would be the one to submit it for me.. Who knows, a little influence may go a long way.
Samuel: so you won try luck??
Me: yes na…
Samuel: ok, your birthday gift wey i go give you no be bathroom slippers again but anti-slap protection. He go help you well well.
Me: abegee get out!! Una too hate her abeg!!
Voice from inside: next should come in with their card.
Me: yepiee. Time to be blessed.
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