Mrs. Ahmed, a beautiful slender woman in her fifties poked her head into my office. I sighed and pushed away the thoughts of my past, the wound in my heart seemed to throb anew each time i remembered the words of the officer on duty who had informed me of my father’s execution. I wondered why i kept on this old cougar as my legal secretary. She doesn’t regard me as her boss, she doesn’t know when to keep her mouth shut and she frets over me all the time. On weekends, she send home cooked meals to me and she’s forever trying to set me up with one relative or the other. I waved her in with my hand, she walked in and stood looking at me in her hawk like way.
” Shark, don’t tell me you are in one of those your moods again ” She said, ” I wonder why you get this way every Saturday. Did some girl break your heart on a Saturday?”
” You know i don’t see anyone on Saturdays, what do you want?”
” You should have stayed at home if you don’t want to see anyone” She muttered under her breath.
” I heard that” I said, wondering who was actually the boss here.
” She’s here”
” Who?” I asked, ” I can’t see any client today, please reschedule”
” Annie is here and i am sending her in” She stated and walked out before I could stop her.
” Hey Shark,” Annie called, catwalking sultrily into my office. She had on a blue body hugging jumpsuit with black heels.
” Annie,” I grounded out with displeasure.
When i met her at a fund raiser which Mrs.Ahmed had forced me to attend i thought she was a beautiful and classy lady which she turned out to be. The only fly in the ointment was that she was beginning to expect too much, she wanted to do all those chummy fairytales things which wasn’t in my book. I had stopped picking her calls when it became incessant and Mrs.Ahmed knew to tell her i wasn’t in but the bossy old lady let her in just to get on my nerves.
” You look tired, are you OK?” She asked, sitting down.
Here we go again i thought.” Annie, i didn’t give you an appointment”
She looked shocked and was suddenly almost at the verge of tears. This Annie would be the death of me i thought. She was my longest association with a woman, soon she would start reeling off potential baby names, redecorating my home and editing her surname to include mine.
” Shark i can’t believe you just said that! are you trying to dump me?” She asked, standing up.” I will be on my way now,”
” Wait Annie,” I said, a bit relunctant to let her go because the s-x was mind blowing and a certain part of me had decided to rear up it’s ugly head although the situation at hand didn’t call for it. ” Today is not a good day. You of all people should know that about me”
She sat down again” What happened? a new case?”
” No, today is just not a good day. What’s up with you?”
” I wish you can trust me with your problems, you know i am here for you right?” She asked lovingly.
I sighed heavily, this was one of the things that scares me. The whole emotional thing and drama.” I am ho.rny”
” Shark!” She shouted incredulously, ” How did that get into the conversation?”
” You said you wished i could share my problems with you. That is one of the problems i have now”
She rolled her eyes, ” Honestly speaking, I give up on you. A friend of mine want to meet you”
I groaned loudly, it was really time to get rid of her. From a friend want to meet you to my mom want to meet you and before you know it they are handing you a bride price list.” My week will be a busy one. Tell her i am so sorry, maybe some other time ”
” Not her, him. He’s a big fan of yours. We can double date him and his girl next weekend. Please don’t say no” She said, her eyes shinning with hope.
” Alright,” I agreed just to get her to shut up.” Let’s get out of here,”
” Where to?’ She asked
” Let’s do lunch and go back to my place ”
I stood up, pulled on my jacket while she picked up her bag. I held open the door for her and we walked out of the office. Mrs.Ahmed looked up and gave me a knowing smile. If not that I doubted i would be allowed to represent myself i would have murdered the old fox right there and then.
The loud voices exchanging words woke me up from my nap. I recognized my mother’s voice and i ran into our living room. Some members of our church and some deacons were seated in the sitting room, my father was pacing back and forth while my mother argued with somebody. My family host the Saturday house fellowship so i wasn’t surprised to see them. But what almost gave me a heart attack was the person my mother was arguing with.
” You have come to the wrong house” My mom said,” Please leave Madam”
” Ehen, is that not Dupe?” Uche’s mom retorted, pointing a finger at me and the others turned to focus their gaze on me.
” Good Afternoon ma,” i said, wondering what she was doing in my house.
” Dupe you know her?” My mom asked in surprise
” Tell your harlot daughter to stay away from my son! My son is married! He has three children!” Uche’s mother shouted, ” Dupe or whatever they call you stay away from us. Stop forcing yourself on my son”
” Woman, leave my house! You can’t just walk into my home and defame my daughter” My father said,” This is a good christian home and no child of mine is a harlot.”
” Ask her If she has not been fornicating with my son!” She said hotly, ” Ashewo! Stay away from my son! useless girl with no home training!. Dupe can’t you defend yourself? tell your parents how you have been spending nights upon nights in my Son’s house!”
” It is enough! What is your problem woman? have you no shame and regard for God?” Mrs.Afolabi, Tade’s mother replied her.” When you walked in you saw us in the mood of praise and worship! if you had anything against Dupe you should have called her mother aside and relay it to her in private! Our Dupe can never stoop so low to do all the vile things you have painted”
” Ohhh!!! So i am lying ehen, ask her nah! Has she not been sleeping with my son outside marriage? I am an aggrieved mother and i don’t want her to ruin the life of my son! You Yoruba people are all the same! You have no shame and self respect!” Uche’ s mother screamed.
I ran back into my room and slammed my door shut in anger and shame. I closed my eyes, blocking my ears with both of my hands. Maybe it was a horrible dream which i will soon wake up from i thought. Tears burned my eyes when it dawned on me that it wasn’t a dream. I could hear Uche’s mother saying all sort of vile things against me. She said i stole from the offering money in church and that i confessed it to her son and as if that wasn’t enough she also mentioned how i stole a suit from my father.I stayed in my room until the voices ceased and the house was thrown in silence. When darkness enveloped the compound and i could hear the cricking of the night insects outside, a soft knock sounded on my door.
” Dupe, ” Mom called softly,” Open the door”
I stood up and opened the door.
” Daddy is angry and he has relieved you of your duty as an usher for a month. We don’t believe all what that woman said but we can’t deny there wasn’t an iota of truth in her words especially about that Daddy’s suit which went missing for days.”
” I am sorry Mom,”
” I am disappointed in you, we brought you up better than that. Funmi will never do such a thing or bring such shame upon her parents.That girl has no single blemish on her character,she’ s almost perfect i tell you.” she said, before walking out of my room.
To be continued..
Almost Perfect-Episode 13