The Coffin Maker Episode 20

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Michael Ansah

(knocks on Agnes Kyerewaa’s door violently and breaks in)

You cheap filty, slut, you think you can infect me with STD and go about freely? Now wait and see what I will do to you.

Agnes Kyerewaa

Mike you are a big fool, in fact you are a brainless human being, I thought because you are a graduate you were matured but you have just proven to me that you are a blockhead. Big body no brain, no job, you had the audacity to break into my privacy early this morning. I will help change your sleeping place today.

Michael Ansah

(didn’t allow Agnes to end her statement and he lands her a blow on her mouth and makes a follow up slap)

You bitch, after infecting me with this evil disease you still have mouth to talk right in front of me. I will rearrange your face for you so that when you see a desperate graduate like me, you will accord him with respect.

Agnes Kyerewaa

(shouting for help)

Please someone should come and help me ooo, someone come rescue me from this monster of a man. Kwaku Mike is killing me please help me.

Bernice Ansah

Who is been beaten this morning that is shouting for help, this compound this morning is full of noise ooo let me go and check so that someone won’t come and narrate something that I could have witness with my own eyes to me. (runs out of the house to where the noise is coming from)

Akua Yankey

(enjoying the stroke her husband is giving to her)

Ah please take your time and hit it from the angle just that way. Yes I like it that way and please squeeze my breast for me a little, oh yes am really enjoying this queenly treatment. But where from that noise am hearing?

Opana

Oh, leave them and concentrate on our special agenda because you don’t need a divided attention now.

AGNES ROOM

Hajia Kubra

Bro Collins, please hurry and separate them before Michael injures Aggie.

Collins Twumasi

Herh, Mike stop that nonsense right this moment, why do you have to fight a lady and even in her room. I say stop it now!!!

Eno Bruwa

Oh God, please come to our rescue before something bad happens here. Please the men around should do something to separate them.

Hajia Kubra

Bro Dennis, please come and help bro Collins because it seems he can’t separate the two people alone. Now Bernice go and get your father if he is still in the house to intervene if not something drastic might happen here this morning.

Bernice Ansah

(runs back to the house screaming and knocks on her parent bedroom door) Papa and mummy if you don’t come out to stop your son he will end up killing someone’s daughter ooo.

Opana

(redraws his thing from his wife and jumps from the bed)

What is going on out there that has made this compound so noisy this morning?

Bernice Ansah

Papa it’s bro Mike, he is beating sister Agnes in her room and no one knows his reason for attacking her this morning.

Opana

Whaaaaat? Is he mad? What has come over him that he has to go and fight someone in her room? Adjoa Bernice I will be there right now. Now woman go out there and stop him because I can’t go out from this room with an erected p***s like this, I will join you shortly when the power in it drops down.

Akua Yankey

(wraps a cloth around her and rushes to Agnes room)

Herh, Kwaku Mike leave that lady right this moment. Are you mad? Who taught you how to behave like this towards a lady?

Michael Ansah

No, mummy let me deal with this slut.

Opana

(lands Mike with a double slap from behind)

You fool, how dare you walk into someone’s room and engage her in a fight. Let go of her this very second before I descend on you right now.

Michael Ansah

(let’s go of Agnes but receives a slap from her)

I’m not done with you yet you witch. I will kill you before you destroy me.

Agnes Kyerewaa

(bleeding from the nose and mouth)

Fool you think you were going to have it easy with me huh? I will meet you boot for boot and bumper to bumper. I will make life unbearable for you in this house, you just wait and see.

Akua Yankey

Now Kwaku Mike, why would you leave the comfort of your house to attack someone in her room, what if the person stabbed you or hit you with anything as a form of self-defence?

Michael Ansah

She is a witch! she is the one who infected me with the STD.

Collins Twumasi

Gods of our land, please save me from this infection. Please deliver me from this atrocity and I will serve you all my life.

Opana

Kwaku Mike you are a big fool. Did she force the infection on you? Didn’t she send caution to you through me? If you have been affected why don’t you find solution and stay away from her? Have you seen how you have injured and disorganised her room? Pray she doesn’t decide to take legal actions towards you because I won’t step in to offer any helping hand. If you know you are so strong and want to start boxing why didn’t you inform me so I enrolled you into a boxing academy in Accra. Am really disappointed in you and I have lost respect for you as a graduate. My dear Agnes you are free to take any action you want without any fear or merit. Am going to prepare for my trip. (walks away from the scene)

Akua Yankey

My husband please come back and plead with Aggie not to press any charges or take any legal action against my son. My daughter, please am very sorry for my son’s foolish attitude please come with me for a first aid.

Agnes Kyerewaa

I don’t need anything from you or anyone from your house. I will so deal with your son that he will learn in a very hard way not to hit any lady again on this earth. I will make life unbearable for him and he will pay dearly with his life for what he has done to me. Please I want to be left alone so everyone can step out of my room.

Collins Twumasi

(sobbing as he steps out)

Oh, my goodness, if Michael has been infected with this STD then my story won’t be an exception since I don’t like using condoms. Awww that means I have also infected Gertrude Osei, Akosua Dufie and Hannah Adjoa Danquah. Hmmmm, if Akosua Dufie is infected then my boss has also contracted it which he will transfer to his wife then the wife will give it to the houseboy and he will also end up infecting the orange seller and from there my guy will also get his portion of it. Gosh it is a small world paaa oooo, how do I alert the other guys to visit the hospital for treatment.

Today my wife to be is coming in and I know she will demand for sex without condom, I can’t deny her because I have been doing so for the past 4months and she is now getting out of patience and suspecting me not to be man enough for her, I can’t afford to lose her because marrying her will change my life totally.

Eno Bruwa

It serves him right, that boy is too proud of himself and he’s even jobless as at now. You are leaving under the same roof of your parent and you go about sleeping around like a dog. Am happy he has been infected with an STD, he will learn his lesson after Agnes has finished dry cleaning him.

Akua Yankey

(who was following Eno Bruwa)

Oh, thank you so much old woman, I now know those who wish me well in this compound. You haven’t paid your rent for months and I always beg my husband on your behalf not knowing you only wish my downfall. We shall see in this house from today you ungrateful wretched woman.

Eno Bruwa

Aunty Akua, please whatever you heard is not the way it is ooo, please don’t take it personal.

Akua Yankey

I won’t but I know what to do and you will hear from me soon. They act as lovers but they are all enemies of progress.

Agnes Kyerewaa

(inside her room)

This fool thinks he can molest and abuse me and go free erh, I will rent a room for him today at the police station. See how he has changed my face with his fist and blows, if I don’t deal with him erh then am not a Friday born and a Kwahu lady.

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OPANA’s LIVING ROOM

Akua Yankey

Kwaku Mike am very disappointed in you and the action you took against that lady. Are you aware you can be imprisoned if she takes any legal steps against you? You heard what your father said before leaving the house that he won’t intervene on your behalf should the lady decide to deal with you legally. Me I have nothing to do if you are caught by the law.

Michael Ansah

I’m sorry mummy, I don’t know what came over me. The money you gave me was what I used in purchasing the drugs and I felt bad after papa spoke harshly with me.

Akua Yankey

Shut up Kwaku Mike, didn’t your father warn you against her. If you know how to pray and fast to God for his mercies do it now because from the look of things you will really face the law. Have you been to the hospital to run a check up on yourself?

Michael Ansah

No but she told me that she has infected me with it after we had sex.

Akua Yankey

See how you are sounding like a broken record. You act like you haven’t stepped foot into a classroom before. So who prescribed the medicine you bought because I know that young pharmacist doesn’t know much about prescribing drugs to people.

Michael Ansah

Aggie was the one who mentioned the names of the drugs for me the day she told me about the infection.

Akua Yankey

Ah, my son you are a fool and very dumb. See how you are been controlled like a remote, have you been getting any signs or symptoms of any infection in or around your manhood lately?

Michael Ansah

Not at all.

Bernice Ansah

(walks into the living room)

Bro Mike, you didn’t try at all, see the way you were fighting with a lady like your fellow man. If I didn’t raise an alarm like you will kill sister Aggie.

Michael Ansah

Will you shut up over there? What do you know at all, are you the one to advice me?

Akua Yankey

Kwaku Mike, keep quiet and listen to the sensible thing that your little sister is saying because it makes a lot of sense. It seems you have left your brain somewhere and I will help you retrieve it soon.

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OPANA’s COMPOUND

Dennis Asomani

Oh Collins, you are here, I have been searching for you all over the place not knowing you are relaxing here under this tree.

Collins Twumasi

My guy if you think am relaxing here then you a very wrong. If you know what is up there like you will seek for cover.

Dennis Asomani

(looks up in the branches of the tree they are sitting under)

Why have you seen any snake up there because for me I fear snakes paaa ooo.

Collins Twumasi

Oh, boy there is fire on the mountain………

What fire could Collins be talking about that is coming from the mountain?

Tbc