Diary Of A Broke Playboy Episode 26


Girlfriends = 23
Side Chics = 27
Bang mates = 12
Crushes = 1 million
Secret Fantasies = 500 million
Milf fantasies = 100
Sugar mommy = 0

I just sketched a rough estimate of my Romance life since when I became aware that men were supposed to run after women. I can’t even remember the age I grew that awareness but I can remember playing that infamous game of hide and seek with my classmate back in my nursery 2. Then our teacher would force us to place our heads on the desk and go to sleep. She would give me a blowjob under the desk and then proceed to hide an empty cabin biscuit pack in her pant and ask me to find it with my hand. Y’all know how that would end up right. That doesn’t matter though, I doubt if I even knew what I was doing.

So my details up there is to let you know that I am not as bad as most of us here lol. See, its just roughly 23 girlfriends up there since I was born, I know some of us here have more than 23 girlfriends as they are reading this thing now. See I’m actually a little bit of a good boy.

So recently, I decided to meditate on my life a bit. I ended making it all about Chinaza and the pregnancy. I started wondering if there is any other girl in my life I would have preferred to be the one in Chinaza’s place.

I remember Maryann, she was so beautiful that I missed receiving holy communion once in the church because I was staring at her. She was 100 yards of everything I wanted and I got her for a period of time. Only problem was that I was 12 and she was 11. We only wrote love letters which we perfumed and rubbed sweet smelling powder on. Apart from that, no other sort of RUBBING took place. I am still looking for her shaa, I hope I find her one day.

Uju, Ujunwa. She was Ebony, a beautiful sort of Ebony. Met her when I just started with Chinaza. Small tits but her ass covered up for what she lacked in Boobs. She gave me the styles that busted my brain, even Cynthia couldn’t do that. We hit it off for a while before she got married after her NYSC. I would have loved her to have a baby for me, only problem was that she was 25 and I was 17 and she was Chinaza’s aunt. Jeez.

Azuka, she was beautiful and petite with a round ass and perky boobs. Those types of boobs that will flow down and then curve up with the nipple like a banana. She was bad and naughty in a way that I liked and can display her love for you even in the street. I was even shy at times. Can you Imagine. There was no problem with this one. Just that I was sharing her with my guy. While he was writing her text messages, I was reading them to her in her father’s bedroom, on the bed each time. We shaa went our way and I didn’t miss her much.

Then Jennifer, not the other Jennifer o, a different Jennifer. A combination of my sperm and her eggs would have produced nothing less than a Chris Brown. She had this way of kissing that could cover up for the sex that we never had. We still talk shaa but she is kinda far away from where I am and wouldn’t want to take this stress of meeting her when I could easily find a good replica of her and her pussy. Only problem we had was that she only loved me fingering her. If we were still together right now, I know my biceps would have been as huge as. Fingering a girl like that beats hitting the Gym.

Who else, who else, who else? So many of them but I can’t remember much again. Now Chinaza seem to be okay to me but I don’t just understand her ways these days. I think it’s the pregnancy thing. Someone cannot even drink garri and drop spoon for her. She is always wanting one thing or the other and she won’t even want to have sex, that’s the most annoying one.

That was how I was waiting for Amara to come home from the Market so I can beg her for a little kiss. Even if its 2 seconds. Chinaza called me that she wants fried rice. Me that can’t cook jollof rice without over watering it or over salting it. And she said she won’t eat take away, that I must cook it myself. The next thing she was threatening to come over to our house if I don’t cook it. I don’t even know if fried rice is actually fried in the real sense or if it’s cooked.
Shaa I agreed to cook. My plan went this way, Amara would come back and when we are done with each other, she would whip up some rice and I will take it over to her.

I was still in my room, whatsapping away on my phone when my door opened. I looked at the door, hoping to see Amara. Chinaza just stood there, scolding me with her eyes.
“So this is where you are cooking the fried rice?”
“See Chianza, I don’t even know how to cook rice, can’t you just look for something else to eat, maybe garri and soup?”
“No I want fried rice.”
She came and sat on the bed, I noticed her tommy was starting to protrude and she walked like a woman in a maternity hospital.

“Just cook me fried rice and we will…. ”
She stopped half way and gave me a suggestive wink.
” We will what?” My heart was thumbing like I was checking my semester results.
“Baby, you know nah,” she said and winked again. Hehehe, see me see youtube, searching for how to cook fried rice. Luckily, my moms no dy joke with food so all the condiments were there. We didn’t have chicken but Fish was in the fridge.
The rice was ready in no time and served in my room. No dulling.

We drank the rice rather than eat it. The water in it no be here. She wanted fried rice. She got it.
“See eh, Neche, I don’t want fried rice again. Just cook indomie.”
“You are not serious, you will finish it o.”
I was getting angry.
“I thought you wanted to do that thing that made me pregnant again?” she said eyeing me with a smile on her face.
“What do you want?” I asked.

I shaa spent the whole day cooking indomie from there to making tea and back to Pap. In the end, just when she said she wasn’t hungry again, after I had brought her Pap, my mother came back.

I spent the rest of the day Washing plates and pots and cleaning the kitchen. The rice went down the wastebasket and the pap with the tea went down Willie’s stomach.

Like I always say. If Chinaza’s doesn’t kill me, I won’t die.

So I noticed that a girl can grow from an Emmanuella to Regina Daniels within a space of 5 years if not shorter and while you are waiting for her to mature, some guys will be chopping her like that. Just like that popular saying, Girls are are like Mango, while you are waiting for them to ripen, some will be eating them with salt.

Like this particular girl in my area. She was like a bamboo like 5 years ago when I first knew her. Fast forward to now, her assets seemed to be way out of this world and like I always say, if she is 15 and her body looks 20 then fucking treat her like she is 20. And I did my age compatibility calculation. My age divided by 2 plus 7. I.e 21 ÷ 2 = 10.5 + 7 = 17.5. Well she should be around 16 so it was close. We could actually start something.

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So on a very good day, just after I have gotten my daily dose of TOMENTATION from my pregnant girlfriend, I decided to catch some fresh air, maybe it will help my frustration evaporate. I was just outside our gate when she walked by, dragging her 2 tons of backside along and seemed to be running after her firm boobs. Immediately I saw her, I knew I needed to talk to her.

“Hey you come here!” I called, I was her senior naa so I needed to add some sort of command to my tone. She came and dropped a good evening on me. I nodded with my attention fixed on the upper part of her body, just below her neck. Think whatever you like. Lol.

“What’s that your name again?” I asked.
“Chidimma,” she replied. She was Ebony and like girls her age had low cut hair. Open teeth. Cute face and beautiful eyes. She could have competed very well with Naza if she was fair.
“Are you in a hurry?”
“Yes, my mom is waiting for me.”
I looked around our environment and did a few seconds thinking.
“Let me walk you down, I want to discuss some things with you.”
She didn’t complain and since her house was just a few meters away, we strolled. I had this aura that would make any girl her age like me easily. At least, she will be bragging that a boy like me talked to her.

I got a little more details about her. In her ss2 and the same class with my our Amara. I’m sure Amara wouldn’t mind.
“So you don’t have a phone yet?” she nodded and I shook my head.
“Quite a pity. How do we now communicate?”
It was a rhetorical question and she knew that.
“Well, can you always come to my house?”
She nodded. She didn’t even ask why I want her to be coming to my house. Girls these days, even the small ones can decode things that are bigger than them.
“See what will happen, can you come out to that field by 6pm today?” I asked, pointing to a nearby field that belonged to a primary school around the corner.
“I’m not sure, but I will try.”
Well we got closer to their gate. Our 6pm date fixed. One last look at her boobs and booty and I was done for the minute. Just when I turned on my way home. My father’s car screeched to a halt beside me. My heart jumped to my mouth as I stood there.

The passenger side window went down and I saw Willie’s teeth shinning at me. I hopped in with relief.
“Where you go naa?” I asked as we moved on.
“I just go give one girl like that heart attack. She just dy form for me because I no dy use ride enter school.”
“So how e go?”
“As she just see me inside this ride, she commot bra for me.”
He was shinning his teeth as he spoke.
“Shaa, I hope you won’t be banging girls inside popsy car. He will smell ur sperm o or you fit forget condom or pant inside.”

6pm and I was patrolling the field like a pregnant woman in a maternity ward. 6:15pm and I was already vexing, blaming Chinaza. If she had dropped something for me. I wouldn’t be here running after a 16 year old girl. I was going to walk home angrily when I spotted her walking towards me. Her short skirt blowing in the wind, revealing her tempting laps. All my anger evaporated.

“Sorry, I was helping my mother with the food,” she said as she got to me.
“Ok, so let’s sit.”
I held her hand and we walked to nearby seat, made of concrete attached to a classroom block. We sat there and I began my preaching.

“.. long and short of it all is that the moment I saw you walking past me, I knew I liked you immediately and would love us to get closer. I don’t know if anyone has ever told you but you are very beautiful.” I confessed, eyeing her boobs like the discussion was between me and it.
She smiled a thank you and flashed her dimples.
“So can we be friends?” I asked.
“Yes, We are friends already.”
“Well that’s not the type that I want.”
“What type do you want?”
“The type that with everything inclusive. Your heart your body, everything.”
My emphasis was more on her body. She smiled and murmured an “I don’t know.” I only needed to prod further and before we knew wassup, she was already tripping. One thing to another and we were already closer. The next thing and we were on each other. It started with a kiss before my hand started its investigative journalism. I just couldn’t wait. The lord blessed us with darkness. The sky was getting darker as the time ticked on.

I was tunning on and off her firm boobs and searching underneath her short skirt while she was grabbing at my Penis. I held her against our concrete seat and made her legs go 45 degrees apart, her pants were already in her purse by then and my penis was already condomed off. I needed no second baby.
I found out it was a bit easy to penetrate her and she grabbed my shirt the moment it hit her. Kissing me violently like I was resuscitating her. I started my thrust and it dawned on me what I had missed for so long just because that crazy Chinaza was pregnant. I went hard and she received me excellently. She was a good baller. We were done before her mother would call her home.

My phone rang and I picked. Chinaza was on the line.
“Neche I want orange.”
“leave me, go and pluck by yourself.”
I cut the phone and faced my latest babe.

“So are we seeing again?” I asked as she brushed the sand off her skirt. She nodded. Why wouldn’t she.

Sha sha. I led her home, didn’t exactly get to their gate. Then I went home. The time by then was roughly 7:45 pm. Naza was already dropping her 10th missed call. I called her back.

“Neche please come, I am bleeding,” she cried. I don’t remember exactly how I did it but I think I jumped our gate because I didn’t remember opening it. I guess I was falling in love with my unborn baby.