You know that moment when you don’t know if you should be happy or burst out crying..I was caught up in a web
“Clarise, stop this joke I have an Award to collect”
I attempted to walk back to the stage and collect the best model of the year award..maybe clarise just wanted to pull my legs, this clarise self
“Bukky”
She drew me back..
“What nah?”
What else does this lady want, I am trying so hard not to believe what she said, ah! What is her own na
“Madam Clara is gone, David and Jeremy dont know yet”
Now my brain accepted the painful fact
“No..”
I broke down in tears, I felt my heart would rip out..
“No not now for Christ sake”
My legs became weak that I sat on the bare tiles..
“Not now”
I knew it was more than three months as the Doctor presumed she would live, but she seemed fine, that I was starting to think it was a miracle
“Bisola oluwatoke, please your trophy awaits”
The host called out to me..I couldn’t get up from where I sat..clarise quickly help me get up
“Go on bukky, please don’t cry up there, I don’t want any of the boys to find out OK”
I wiped my tears and sniffed in before I marched out, vodka stood with her team on the other end with the trophy in her hands, she was to crown me..she was crying as she approached me, for what?
“This one never even see life she they cry?”
I thought..she crowned me, and hurried off, I was supposed to take a photograph alone which would be the new face of “The House Of Earl” but I insisted me and my crew take the photo together, we all worked for it..
It was time to give my speech..my hands were shaking..I am not supposed to cry, yes I should be happy right now. As I collected the mic, I looked sideways to clarise.. She beckoned with her eyes..i should fight this
I cleared my throat
“I started as nothing in the house, and today I proudly lift this trophy..i am here today because of one woman..”
Oh God, its madam Clara, she made me who I am, that was I planned to say, but she is gone now..
I swear I tried so hard to hold it in but I burst out crying profusely.. I couldn’t hold the pain..I could hear the audience murmur for a while before the roared with applause..they would be thinking its tears of Joy..only one person understood..i bit my lips, I tried so hard to control myself, but the moment I met his eyes with tears dropping uncontrollably,he asked with his eyes
“What’s wrong bukky?
I said in my mind
“Mum is gone David”
And he understood.
TBC
